To Correct Historical Inequity, Mamdani Demands Half The 9/11 Memorial Be Dedicated To The Hijackers
NEW YORK, NEW YORK — Addressing escalating friction with victims’ families ahead of the upcoming Ground Zero 9/11 commemoration, Mayor Zohran Mamdani announced a sweeping municipal initiative Wednesday to overhaul the National September 11 Memorial, demanding that exactly half of the reflective pools and engraved plaques be reallocated to honor the 19 hijackers. Mamdani said the proposal was necessary to…
Keir Starmer Wondering If He’s Still Invited To Next Year’s World Leaders’ Coke Party
LONDON, UK — Pacing the living room of his remarkably quiet home,…
To Correct Historical Inequity, Mamdani Demands Half The 9/11 Memorial Be Dedicated To The Hijackers
NEW YORK, NEW YORK — Addressing escalating friction with victims’ families ahead…
Female Clancy Jurors Say They Felt ‘Unsafe’ Around Male Holdout Who Kept Insisting Killing Children Should Have Consequences
PLYMOUTH, MASSACHUSETTS — Several female jurors who deliberated in the Lindsay Clancy…
‘Empire Strikes Back’ Scene Redubbed For New York TV: ‘No, I Am Your Non-Gestating Parent’
NEW YORK, NY — The iconic scene from The Empire Strikes Back…
UK Officials Ask Public To Stop Interfering With Government’s Efforts To Ignore The Border
LONDON, UK — British officials are asking members of the public to…
Mitch McConnell Takes Labor Day Off From Being Dead
WASHINGTON — After working tirelessly around the clock to appear fully deceased…
Georgia Authorities Rule HeeHaw The Donkey Died By Suicide After Shooting Himself Twice In Back Of Head
CEDARTOWN, GEORGIA—Putting to rest weeks of online speculation and public outrage, the…
Child Asks Dad If ‘Mistrial’ Means Mom Is Allowed To Start Killing People Now
PLYMOUTH, MASSACHUSETTS — Following the breaking news of a mistrial in the…
Keir Starmer Wondering If He’s Still Invited To Next Year’s World Leaders’ Coke Party
LONDON, UK — Pacing the living room of his remarkably quiet home,…
Ford Releases New Trump-Inspired ‘F-U 150’ Truck
(PARODY) Commercial for Ford Motor Company's newest pickup truck, the Ford F-U 150, a Trump-inspired model reportedly conceived within minutes of the president flipping off a heckler and repeatedly telling him “F…
Miriam Adelson And John Paulson Formally Awarded Co-Custody Of Ed Gallrein Following Successful Primary Adoption
HEBRON, KENTUCKY — In a touching scene that restored faith in the power of multi-million-dollar dark money investments, family court mediators confirmed that billionaire casino magnate Miriam Adelson and Wall…
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Daily Soak is an American satire news company that’s run out of a squalid sweatshop in the outskirts of Beijing, China under various labor law...
