Ed Gallrein Assures Voters He Only Followed OnlyFans Model To Keep An Eye On The ‘Moral Decay Of America’
HEBRON, KENTUCKY — Facing intense scrutiny just as voters head to the polls, Kentucky Republican congressional challenger Ed Gallrein held a press conference Tuesday morning to clarify that his official campaign Instagram account only subscribed to and interacted with a prominent OnlyFans bondage-themed nude model as part of a high-stakes, late-night intelligence operation into the nation's spiritual decline. The self-proclaimed…
Keir Starmer Warns Nation That People Waving British Flags Are A Critical Threat To British Values
LONDON, UK — Prime Minister Keir Starmer issued an emergency national warning…
Ed Gallrein Assures Voters He Only Followed OnlyFans Model To Keep An Eye On The ‘Moral Decay Of America’
HEBRON, KENTUCKY — Facing intense scrutiny just as voters head to the…
Shocking Accusation: Whistleblower Claims Thomas Massie Hung Toilet Paper In ‘Under’ Position During 2018 Dinner Party
FRANKFORT, KENTUCKY — The increasingly bitter Kentucky Republican primary descended into unprecedented territory…
European Union Apologizes To Car-Ramming Terrorist For Dents Left In His Rental Vehicle By Civilians
BRUSSELS — In a globally televised press conference Sunday morning, top officials…
Tensions Rise On Ben Shapiro’s Forehead As Right Eyebrow Annexes Left Eyebrow Territory
BOCA RATON, FLORIDA — Insisting that the historic expansion was both necessary…
Keir Starmer Warns Nation That People Waving British Flags Are A Critical Threat To British Values
LONDON, UK — Prime Minister Keir Starmer issued an emergency national warning…
Xi Jinping Gives Trump Personal Tour Of Chinese Factory Manufacturing Trump Merchandise
HANGZHOU, CHINA– In a move described as on the nose, President Xi…
King Charles Assures Migrants Digital ID Will Only Be Used Against White British Citizens
LONDON, UK — Seeking to soothe the anxieties of the the millions…
Trump-China Summit Postponed After Xi’s Arm Breaks Following One Handshake
BEIJING, CHINA — The highly anticipated summit between U.S. President Donald Trump…
Ford Releases New Trump-Inspired ‘F-U 150’ Truck
(PARODY) Commercial for Ford Motor Company's newest pickup truck, the Ford F-U 150, a Trump-inspired model reportedly conceived within minutes of the president flipping off a heckler and repeatedly telling him “F…
Republicans Worried They May Win Midterms If They Codify Trump’s Agenda
WASHINGTON-- After President Donald Trump signed yet another executive order aimed at making American great again, Republicans in Congress began worrying and discussing amongst themselves the unfortunate possibility that they…
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Daily Soak is an American satire news company that’s run out of a squalid sweatshop in the outskirts of Beijing, China under various labor law...
