German Leaders Praise Terrorist Suspect For Ramming Pride Attendees Rather Than Throwing Them Off Rooftops
BERLIN, GERMANY — In a stunning display of progressive optimism following Saturday’s deadly vehicle ramming at the Berlin Pride parade, German officials held a press conference to publicly commend 21-year-old terror suspect Abdul Ballout for his measured and distinctly modernized approach to anti-LGBTQ+ extremism. While acknowledging that driving a white van into a crowd of pedestrians in Tiergarten park was…
GoFundMe Launched For Financially Struggling Elon Musk After Net Worth Falls Below $1 Trillion
AUSTIN, TEXAS — In response to Elon Musk's heartbreaking fall below the…
German Leaders Praise Terrorist Suspect For Ramming Pride Attendees Rather Than Throwing Them Off Rooftops
BERLIN, GERMANY — In a stunning display of progressive optimism following Saturday’s…
Larry The Cat Caught Carrying Giant Rat Out Of Downing Street By The Scruff Of Its Neck
LONDON, UK — Onlookers gathered outside 10 Downing Street erupted into applause…
Ilhan Omar Argues Embezzling $250 Million Was Victimless Crime Since Kids Were Made Up Anyway
MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA — Standing before a crowded press pool on Friday, Representative…
GoFundMe Launched For Financially Struggling Elon Musk After Net Worth Falls Below $1 Trillion
AUSTIN, TEXAS — In response to Elon Musk's heartbreaking fall below the…
RFK Jr. Discovered Sleeping Upside Down On White House Ceiling To Improve Circulation
WASHINGTON — White House officials confirmed that Health and Human Services Secretary…
Democrats Vow To Protect Democracy By Making Future Voter Fraud Impossible To Detect
TRENTON, NEW JERSEY — Following the horrifying revelation that a New Jersey…
Republicans Celebrate Amnesty Deal Where Democrats Got Everything And Republicans Pretended To Fight
WASHINGTON — House Republicans held a triumphant press conference Tuesday celebrating what…
Keir Starmer Steps Down As Prime Minister To Spend More Time With His Local Grooming Gang
LONDON, UK — Bringing an end to one of the least popular…
Ford Releases New Trump-Inspired ‘F-U 150’ Truck
(PARODY) Commercial for Ford Motor Company's newest pickup truck, the Ford F-U 150, a Trump-inspired model reportedly conceived within minutes of the president flipping off a heckler and repeatedly telling him “F…
Democrats Vow To Counter Trump’s Obama Meme By Running Racist Biden Again
WASHINGTON — After condemning a controversial meme video shared by President Donald Trump that depicted a Lion King parody featuring the Obamas with monkey bodies, leading Democrats held an emergency…
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Daily Soak is an American satire news company that’s run out of a squalid sweatshop in the outskirts of Beijing, China under various labor law...
