Man Arrives In Hell To Discover Eternal Torment Is Just Being Followed By Flock Cameras
HELL — A newly damned man arrived in Hell this week expecting the traditional eternal punishment of fire, brimstone, and demonic torture, only to discover that Satan had devised something he considered far worse and sinister: being followed by Flock cameras everywhere he goes for all eternity. "I begged for the pitchforks," said 47-year-old Marcus Ellison, staring in horror at…
Harry And Meghan Demand Privacy During Nationwide Publicity Tour To Announce Their Return To Britain
LONDON, UK — In a desperate bid to finally be left alone,…
Man Arrives In Hell To Discover Eternal Torment Is Just Being Followed By Flock Cameras
HELL — A newly damned man arrived in Hell this week expecting…
Target Apologizes To Black Community For Racist Clown Costume By Offering 10% Off Next Purchase Of Fried Chicken
MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA — Following a nationwide PR disaster, Target executives issued a sweeping…
Doug Ford Threatens To Punish America By Stopping Ontario From Making Money
TORONTO, ONTARIO — Ontario Premier Doug Ford issued a stern warning to…
Mark Carney Caves On Tariffs After Trump Threatens To Return Ted Cruz To Canada
OTTAWA, CANADA — Prime Minister Mark Carney abruptly caved on Canada's retaliatory…
Texas Longhorn Forced To Sell Itself On Street Corner After Losing Job To Cheaper Foreign Cattle
FORT WORTH, TEXAS — A Texas Longhorn who spent years preparing for a…
Lindsay Clancy Supporters Erect 40-Foot Bronze Altar To Moloch Outside Courthouse
PLYMOUTH, MASSACHUSETTS — The plaza outside the Plymouth County Courthouse took on a distinctively…
Harry And Meghan Demand Privacy During Nationwide Publicity Tour To Announce Their Return To Britain
LONDON, UK — In a desperate bid to finally be left alone,…
Kash Patel Lures Eric Swalwell Out Of Hiding By Dressing As Chinese Prostitute
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA — After weeks of struggling to locate former Rep.…
Ford Releases New Trump-Inspired ‘F-U 150’ Truck
(PARODY) Commercial for Ford Motor Company's newest pickup truck, the Ford F-U 150, a Trump-inspired model reportedly conceived within minutes of the president flipping off a heckler and repeatedly telling him “F…
Biden Proudly Shows Reporters His Rare Soiled Diaper Collection
WASHINGTON-- The most popular president of all time Joe Biden has let the world into his personal life by showing news reporters his ultrarare, cool, hip collection of used diapers…
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Daily Soak is an American satire news company that’s run out of a squalid sweatshop in the outskirts of Beijing, China under various labor law...
