London Declared Safest City In Europe For People Who Don’t Visit London
LONDON, UK β London has officially been declared the safest city in…
Elmo Insists New Chinese Muppet Was Just A Friend Who Wanted To Learn About US Military Bases
SESAME STREET β Elmo defended his friendship with a newly arrived Chinese…
Congress Introduces Historic Bill To Give Every Homeless Veteran A Cardboard Box
WASHINGTON β In what congressional leaders are describing as a historic breakthrough…
AOC Accuses Americans Of Islamophobia For Not Celebrating Hindu Manure Festival
WASHINGTON β Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, AOC, accused Americans of rampant Islamophobia Tuesday…
Trump Retaliates For China’s Spying By Sending Marco Rubio To Charm Xi Jinping
WASHINGTONΒ β President Donald Trump announced Tuesday that the United States was launching…
UK Police Arrest Sexual Predator After Establishing The Suspect Is Not Muslim
LONDON, UK β British police announced Monday that they had successfully arrested…
Trump Surprised To Learn Voters Took His Mass Deportation Promise Seriously
WASHINGTON β President Donald Trump reportedly expressed surprise Monday after discovering that…
Pharisees Accuse Jesus Of Spreading Dangerous Misinformation After He Quotes Scripture
JERUSALEM β Local religious authorities accused Jesus of spreading dangerous misinformation Sunday…
Greg Abbott Wondering If He Spent Too Much Time Working For Everyone But Texans
AUSTIN, TEXAS β Following his stunning election defeat Tuesday, outgoing Texas Governor…
Progressive Transplants Confident They Can Ruin Texas Even Faster Than They Ruined California
AUSTIN, TEXAS β Thousands of progressive transplants arriving in Texas from California…
Newsom Insists California Has No Place For State-Sanctioned Killing Unless It’s Unborn Babies
SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA β Declaring that California has no place for state-sanctioned killing,…
Trump Mercifully Nukes Texas To Spare Remaining Conservatives From Living Under Democrat Rule
WASHINGTON β President Donald Trump announced Friday that he had reluctantly authorized…


