Democrats Reject Iran’s Endorsement For Being Too Moderate
WASHINGTON — Democratic leaders announced Thursday that they had formally rejected an endorsement…
Cat Congress Moves To Legalize Catnip In All 50 States
WASHINGTON—The Cat Congress announced Friday that it had begun working on legislation…
X Engineers Attempt To Corrupt Grok With Sinful Content After It Declares ‘Christ Is King’
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA — X engineers reportedly launched an urgent effort Friday…
France Celebrates Successful Immigrant Assimilation
PARIS, FRANCE — In a triumphant press conference held in front of…
Tennessee Asks Canada For Help With Christa Pike Execution After Learning Canadian Doctors Have More Experience Killing People
NASHVILLE, TENNESSEE — Tennessee officials announced Thursday that the state was turning to…
Canada Assures White Canadians MAID Will Make Room For Someone From Overseas
OTTAWA, CANADA — The Canadian government assured White Canadians this week that…
Clancy Lawyer Asks If Anyone Has Considered Possibility Black Holdout Juror Killed The Kids
PLYMOUTH, MASSACHUSETTS — In a dramatic shift in legal strategy following a…
UK Police Torn Between Stopping Terrorist Attack And Arresting Grandma Over Facebook Meme
LONDON, UK — Metropolitan Police officials were reportedly facing a difficult decision…
American Hospital Fires Resident Doctor After Horrifying Discovery That He Was Born In America
BALTIMORE, MARYLAND— An American hospital fired one of its resident doctors Friday…
UK Anti-Racism Activists Tell White British Citizens To ‘Go Back To Where They Came From’
LONDON, UK — Anti-racism activists protesting a Restore Britain campaign event in…
Netanyahu Promises To Pass Over Any Congressman With Israeli Flag On Their Door
WASHINGTON — Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu announced Friday that his political…
Judge Releases Repeat Murderer After Deeming 10-Minute Timeout Enough To Teach Him A Lesson
PORTLAND, OREGON— A local circuit court judge dismissed all charges against a…