Grand Moff Tarkin Claims He Gave People Of Alderaan Two Minutes To Evacuate Before Blowing Up Planet
WORLD-- In order to stop the Rebel Alliance and bring order to…
Israel Tortures Hamas Prisoners By Forcing Them To Listen To Videos Of Ben Shapiro Babbling On Incessantly
TEL AVIV, ISRAEL-- Dozens of world leaders as well as various humanitarian…
Israel Makes War Friendlier By Putting Smiley Faces On Bombs Before Dropping Them
GAZA-- In an effort to make the horrors of war a little…
Netanyahu Announces Israel’s Invasion Of Poland
TEL AVIV, ISRAEL-- Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu gave a fiery speech on…
Zelensky Changes Look To Try And Get More Money As Ukraine Support Wanes
KIEV, UKRAINE-- As the money began drying up due to more Americans…
Canada’s Justin Trudeau Apologizes For Wearing Whiteface
OTTAWA, CANADA-- A rare photo surfaced recently of Justin Trudeau wearing what…
Canadian Parliament Releases New Hitler One Hundred Dollar Bill To Commemorate Nazis Fight Against Russians
OTTAWA, CANADA-- During a meeting where they praised a WW2 veteran who…
President Zelensky Appoints Satan As New Ambassador For Ukraine
KIEV, UKRAINE-- After asking spirit-cooking performance artist Marina Abramović to be his…
Illegal African Migrant Becomes New Prime Minister Of Italy
ROME, ITALY-- An illegal African migrant who recently arrived in Italy by…
Chinese Citizens Mystified By Strange, Round, Orange Object Floating In China Sky
BEIJING, CHINA-- An extremely unusual occurrence happened in China this week when…
Putin Surrenders After ‘White Lizzo’ Chris Christie Goes Twerking While In Ukraine
KIEV, UKRAINE-- Russian President Vladimir Putin has officially surrendered and has begun…
Emmanuel Macron Ends France Riots By Playing Elton John’s ‘I’m Still Standing’ Song Over And Over Again
PARIS, FRANCE-- In order to restore order to the massive riots overtaking…
