BUENOS AIRES, ARGENTINA– On Sunday chainsaw-wielding populist Javier Milei became the next president of Argentina in a landslide victory and the Libertarian candidate celebrated his massive win by ripping a random leftist’s head clear off their body.
While running around a stage and yelling in celebration in front of thousands of cheering supporters, Milei suddenly bolted into the crowd and grabbed a pink-haired man who was protesting the election of the new president.
“What do you think about me now, you leftist scum?” Milei screamed at the startled man, grabbing his pink hair and severing his head from his twitching body. “You leftist sons of bitches better be afraid because there’s a new president in town and my first order of business is to bring freedom to Argentina by removing all you leftard trash.”
The large crowd of rowdy people cheered as Milei held the pink-haired severed head up high before kicking it into the audience like a soccer ball.
“Now that’s using your head,” said Milei jokingly as he licked the blood off his hand as a warning to all leftists. “I guess he’s not laughing his head off now. I suppose he was in over his head and let all that leftist, collectivist crap go to his head.”
Leftwing news media outlets in Argentina were quick to condemn Milei as “not presidential” for the way he laughed at the leftist man after removing the head instead of just ripping off the head and then moving on respectfully.
That was some brutal head.