JERUSALEM — Local religious authorities accused Jesus of spreading dangerous misinformation Sunday after the Galilean preacher quoted Scripture during a public teaching, prompting an emergency meeting among Pharisee leaders concerned that the public might begin taking the sacred texts at face value.
According to Rabbinic fact-checkers, Jesus committed multiple severe policy violations during a morning discourse by reading directly from the Scroll of Isaiah and asserting that the text applied to present-day events.
“It’s deeply irresponsible to take isolated passages from Scripture and present them to people without the proper context, qualifications, or approval from the religious establishment,” said senior Pharisee spokesman Eleazar ben Hanan, who declined to identify which part of Jesus’s teaching was inaccurate. “Just because something is written in Scripture doesn’t mean you can go around quoting it as though it means what it says.”
The controversy reportedly began when Jesus challenged the Pharisees for placing their own traditions above the commandments of God, citing passages from the very Scriptures they claimed to uphold.
“We believe Scripture should be handled responsibly by people who understand the importance of not allowing its actual meaning to interfere with the traditions we’ve spent generations building.” Eleazar clarified.
At press time, Pharisees were reportedly preparing a statement condemning Jesus for taking Scripture out of context after discovering that the context of the passages made their criticism even worse.
