Total Recall: New Procedure Let’s You Pretend You’re Back In Better Time When Trump Was President
U.S.-- A highly sophisticated new technology has been recently developed that gives…
Elon Musk Now Controls Twitter CEO’s Brain With Neuralink
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA-- Immediately after purchasing a 9.2% stake in Twitter, Elon…
Pfizer Breathes Sigh Of Relief As Americans Now Focused On Russia
NEW YORK, NEW YORK-- Drug company Pfizer has been doing the happy…
America’s Top Physicians Bill Gates And Big Bird Prove U.S. Leads World In Modern Medicine
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA-- While giving a speech at a medical symposium with…
COVID Vaccine Has Heart Attack After Getting Injected With Chris Christie
TRENTON, NEW JERSEY-- An unfortunate injury happened Sunday when the COVID vaccine…
GoFundMe Claims It Tested Positive For COVID And Has To Isolate Indefinitely
REDWOOD CITY, CALIFORNIA-- Fundraising platform GoFundMe announced early this morning that it…
Physician’s Hippocratic Oath Updated To ‘First, Do As Pfizer Says’ To Reflect Modern Medicine
CHICAGO, ILLINOIS-- To better reflect the state of current modern medical practice,…
Local Man Quits Vaccine Addiction For Much Safer Heroin Habit
SEATTLE, WASHINGTON-- In an effort to wean himself off the more hardcore…
COVID Says It’s Happy To Be Finally Rid Of AOC
NEW YORK, NEW YORK-- COVID-19 has made a full recovery and is…
Healthcare Workers Avoid Vaccine Mandate By Identifying As Members Of Congress
U.S.-- Immediately after SCOTUS ruled that healthcare workers are unable to make…
Fauci Says More Dog Testing Experiments Are Needed To Better Understand Origin Of COVID
WASHINGTON-- During a Senate committee hearing on the origins of the COVID-19…
TikTok Nurses Start Practicing Their Dance Moves In Preparation For Next COVID Surge
BOSTON, MASSACHUSETTS-- Once leftwing news outlets put the word out that the…
