LAS VEGAS, NEVADA– Already planning his next boxing match after fighting 57-year-old Mike Tyson, YouTuber turned boxer Jake Paul, 27, was proud to announce that his next opponent in the ring will be none other than famous boxing legend from the 1940s, 94-year-old Barney “Grandpa” Stewart.
At almost a century old, Grandpa Stewart began his boxing career in 1948 when he was a young, 18-year-old and Harry S. Truman was president of the United States. Although Stewart hasn’t fought a boxing match since 1968, he promises that he will be ready for his upcoming match against the much younger Paul and won’t let the fact that he uses a wheelchair most of the time stop him.
“Huh, what you say, sonny?” The senile Stewart asked a sports reporter interviewing him from his nursing home. “Oh yes, yes, my upcoming boxing match against that young whipper-snapper John Peter. Don’t you folks worry, I’ll be ready for that fight. I have my sixth heart surgery coming up next week, but I’ll still tear Jim Page a new one.”
The rabble-rouser Jake Paul did a few interviews to taunt old man Stewart, but also hinted that this match may be his toughest one yet due to Grandpa Stewart’s decades of experience.
“Some people say I purposely pick fights with all these old guys who are out of their prime,” said Paul heatedly while picking out a new face tattoo. “People are just jealous of my mad skills and if they keep talking crap about me then maybe I’ll be fighting their great-grandpop next.”
At publishing time, there was sad news reported that Barney “Grandpa” Stewart had passed away after trying to get up from his wheelchair to pick up one of his old boxing gloves. When reached for comment, Jake said Stewart was just scared to fight him and that the fight with Grandpa’s corpse was still on.
