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    Fat liberal white woman wearing a "Trump For Prison" shirt holding a jar of candy standing in front of children wearing Halloween costumes in front of a home.
    Liberal Asks Children If They Support Trump Before Giving Them Candy
    October 31, 2026
    Two kids wearing Halloween costumes standing in front of a home with a "Free Lindsay Clancy" lawn sign.
    Local Kids Agree To Skip Trick-Or-Treating At Houses Displaying ‘Free Lindsay’ Signs
    October 29, 2026
    Indian FBI Director Director Kash Patel wearing an FBI jacket sitting at desk staring at a laptop.
    FBI Scours Police Blotters For Crimes It Can Pretend It Solved
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    Female fitness influencer wearing gym clothes staring into a mirror for a TikTok video.
    Fitness Influencer Up All Night Practicing Outraged Reaction For Upcoming TikTok Video
    October 14, 2026
    Canada doctor smiling at insert of Tennessee death row inmate Christa Pike.
    Tennessee Asks Canada For Help With Christa Pike Execution After Learning Canadian Doctors Have More Experience Killing People
    October 1, 2026
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    Kamala Harris staring at an Alaska ballot with a large bottle of wine on her table.
    Kamala Harris Sees Four Dan Sullivans On Alaska Ballot
    October 31, 2026
    Gavin Newsom giving an interview with a California news reporter with an insert of President Trump.
    Newsom Accuses Trump Of Trying To Steal Elections Democrats Are Trying To Steal
    October 30, 2026
    Democrat men James Talarico and Joe Biden dressed in suits standing in a Texas cemetery.
    Biden Stumps For Talarico In Bid To Turn Out The Deceased Vote
    October 26, 2026
    Male Muslim Abdul El-Sayed giving a speech during a rally with people in the background.
    Abdul El-Sayed Fires Up Progressive Crowd By Executing Republican During Rally
    October 25, 2026
    Tim Walz standing on stage in front of his old white-haired brother in Minnesota.
    Tim Walz Kisses His Brother To Prove There’s Nothing Weird About Ilhan Omar’s Brother Marriage
    October 23, 2026
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    Canada Prime Minister Mark Carney wearing a suit on stage speaking on MAID.
    Canada Adds Conservatism To List Of Conditions Eligible For MAID
    November 1, 2026
    Iranian woman wearing a black burka standing in a small room.
    Iran Considers Allowing Women To Smile In Private Provided No Men Can See Them
    October 29, 2026
    Female Japanese Prime Minister shaking hands with male Bangladesh president on stage during immigration deal.
    Japanese Government Assures Public It Has Learned Nothing From Europe
    October 28, 2026
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    God Asks James Talarico To Stop Speaking On His Behalf
    October 28, 2026
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    UK Company Develops New Rape-Proof Underwear For Women Who Still Leave The House
    October 26, 2026
  • Entertainment
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    Star Wars Anakin Skywalker wearing robe standing in Jedi Council room in front of three black Jedi Knights wearing robes.
    Anakin Skywalker Loses Jedi Master Position To Less Qualified Diversity Hires
    November 2, 2026
    CNN anchor Jake Tapper wearing a suit live on air in newsroom.
    CNN Denies Allegations It Has Been Reporting Real News
    November 2, 2026
    Panel of Fox News hosts discussing the President Trump media blackout.
    Fox News Fills Trump Blackout By Spending Six Hours Discussing Its Trump Blackout
    September 21, 2026
    CNN anchor Jake Tapper in a suit reporting on President Trump's press ban.
    CNN Threatens Trump With Accurate Reporting If White House Ban Isn’t Lifted
    September 19, 2026
    Star Wars Empire Strikes Back scene with Darth Vader shown on New York TV.
    ‘Empire Strikes Back’ Scene Redubbed For New York TV: ‘No, I Am Your Non-Gestating Parent’
    September 8, 2026
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    Two white lab mice on one side of cage staring at six brown and black mice on other side of cage in laboratory.
    Lab Mice Replaced After Imported Foreign Mice Work For Less Cheese
    October 22, 2026
    Pfizer CEO man in suit standing in the middle of two other suited executives in a boardroom.
    Pfizer Says Reports Of Side Effects Distract From Vaccine’s Positive Impact On Profits
    October 20, 2026
    Bald male Indian Microsoft CEO on stage giving a speech.
    Microsoft Boasts ‘Most Inclusive Workplace’ After Replacing Americans With Indians From Two Entirely Different Upper Castes
    October 9, 2026
    X Grok post image with the words "Christ Is King."
    X Engineers Attempt To Corrupt Grok With Sinful Content After It Declares ‘Christ Is King’
    October 2, 2026
    American white male doctor standing in front of a desk of an Indian man wearing a suit and tie.
    American Hospital Fires Resident Doctor After Horrifying Discovery That He Was Born In America
    September 27, 2026
  • Sports
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    Sydney Sweeney Stars In New UK Sports Betting Ad
    September 17, 2026
    Texas Longhorns orange and white logo with the bull changed to a cow wearing a turban.
    Texas Longhorns Unveil New Logo To Better Reflect University’s Changing Demographics
    September 15, 2026
    EU female athletes wearing full-body black burkas.
    EU Solves Objectification Of Female Athletes By Mandating Progressive, Full-Body Burkas
    July 15, 2026
    MLB at the San Francisco Giants baseball stadium during Pride Month.
    MLB Suspends God For Three Games Following Unauthorized Rainbow Usage
    June 17, 2026
    Lindsey Graham wearing a Octagon Girl uniform holding up a sign at Trump's UFC Freedom Event.
    Trump Unveils Pride Month Concession By Appointing Lindsey Graham As Lead Octagon Girl For UFC Freedom Event
    June 14, 2026
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Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer sitting at table with Ouija board.
POLITICS

Democrats Use Ouija Board To Communicate With Ginsburg’s Spirit To Prove Her Dying Wish

WASHINGTON-- Persistent Democrats have finally proven that Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg's dying wish to hold off on appointing a new judge is in fact true, using a Ouija…

Daily Soak Staff
Daily Soak Staff
September 24, 2020
Donald Trump laughing while standing inside classroom.
POLITICS

Shocking Allegation: Trump’s Eighth Grade Teacher Accuses Him Of Using Number 2 Pencil In Class

NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- A former teacher of Donald Trump came out of hiding and accused the president of using a number 2 pencil back in the eighth grade…

Daily Soak Staff
Daily Soak Staff
September 18, 2020
Joe Biden handing yellow rotary phone to fat, bald man.
POLITICS

Joe Biden Promises Free Vintage Rotary Phones For All If Elected President

WASHINGTON-- Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden said that if he is elected president he would ensure that every American would get a free vintage rotary phone as a way to…

Daily Soak Staff
Daily Soak Staff
September 13, 2020
United States White House front lawn.
POLITICS

White House Reporters Refuse To Wear Masks After Trump Posts ‘No Mask, No Service’ Signs

WASHINGTON-- Brave reporters are refusing to wear coronavirus masks during all future press briefings after President Donald Trump's totalitarian edict that states all journalists must wear masks inside the White…

Daily Soak Staff
Daily Soak Staff
September 8, 2020
Donald Jr. and Eric Trump holding up a blue mailbox.
POLITICS

Don Jr. And Eric Trump Capture And Kill Endangered USPS Mailbox On Hunting Trip

WASHINGTON-- Donald Trump Jr. and Eric Trump caused an uproar among voting rights activists when photos surfaced recently of the president's two sons holding a dead mailbox that they had…

Daily Soak Staff
Daily Soak Staff
September 1, 2020
Nake Gavin Newsom standing behind podium in front of blue curtain.
POLITICS

Governor Gavin Newsom Threatens To Work Naked If California Citizens Don’t Follow Coronavirus Rules

SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA-- Gov. Gavin Newsom issued a new executive order on Monday in response to the lagging coronavirus pandemic reaction by California citizens, which states that people have 14 days…

Daily Soak Staff
Daily Soak Staff
August 25, 2020
Obama wearing gray suit while hovering in clouds.
POLITICS

CNN: Millions Of People Cured Of Cancer After Listening To Obama’s Divine Democratic Convention Speech

MILWAUKEE, WISCONSIN-- Barack Obama gave one of the most riveting speeches in world history during Wednesday's virtual Democratic National Convention, with many people from around the world reporting that their…

Daily Soak Staff
Daily Soak Staff
August 20, 2020
Joe Biden wearing suit in front of bookshelf.
POLITICS

Build Black Better: Joe Biden Offers Free Crack To First 500 Blacks Who Vote For Him

WASHINGTON-- President Joe Biden returned to CBS News on Friday to force correspondent Errol Barnett to apologize to him for asking about his cognitive abilities during their intense first interview…

Daily Soak Staff
Daily Soak Staff
August 16, 2020
Joe Biden and Grampa Simpson standing inside basement.
POLITICS

Joe Biden Hires Famous Cartoon Actor Grampa Simpson As His New Campaign Manager

WASHINGTON-- Presumptive Democratic nominee Joe Biden reorganized his campaign staff Sunday by firing his current campaign manager and then hiring world famous cartoon wordsmith Grampa Simpson, sending President Donald Trump…

Daily Soak Staff
Daily Soak Staff
August 10, 2020
White man working at doughnut shop spitting into cup of coffee.
U.S. NEWS

Dunkin’ Donuts Giving Away Free Spit-Flavored Coffee To Cops Every Saturday This August

CANTON, MASSACHUSETTS-- What better way for Dunkin' Donuts to show their respect for the boys in blue than by giving away their famous spit-flavored coffee for free as part of…

Daily Soak Staff
Daily Soak Staff
August 3, 2020
Chinese man wearing Nancy Pelosi mask inside Capitol Building.
POLITICS

Clever Chinese Spies Disguise Themselves As Democrats To Openly Steal Secrets For China

HOUSTON, TEXAS-- Chinese agents have had to get more creative after President Donald Trump recently sniffed out a group of spies who were stealing highly sensitive information for the government…

Daily Soak Staff
Daily Soak Staff
July 25, 2020
Joe Biden in front of American flag and coronavirus.
POLITICS

Worried Coronavirus Says He’s Voting For Trump So He Doesn’t Lose His Job After November

NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- Coronavirus gave an interview on Fox News this morning about the uncertainty of whether he'll still have a job if Joe Biden beats Donald Trump…

Daily Soak Staff
Daily Soak Staff
July 19, 2020
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