Ed Gallrein Assures Voters He Only Followed OnlyFans Model To Keep An Eye On The ‘Moral Decay Of America’
HEBRON, KENTUCKY — Facing intense scrutiny just as voters head to the…
Shocking Accusation: Whistleblower Claims Thomas Massie Hung Toilet Paper In ‘Under’ Position During 2018 Dinner Party
FRANKFORT, KENTUCKY — The increasingly bitter Kentucky Republican primary descended into unprecedented territory…
Arsonists Of America Endorse Karen Bass For L.A. Mayor
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA — Citing her inspiringly hands-off approach to combustion, the…
Katie Porter Tries To Woo Suburban Moms By Berating Babies
IRVINE, CALIFORNIA — In a desperate bid to humanize her image ahead…
Gavin Newsom’s Tough Guy Photo Op Undermined By Extremely Gay Power Tool Stance
SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA — Governor Gavin Newsom’s choreographed photo opportunity at a California…
Tim Walz Blasts FBI Daycare Raids For Leaving Thousands Of Fake Children Without Care
ST. PAUL, MINNESOTA — In a fiery and deeply emotional press conference…
King Charles Presents Trump With Gift Of Keir Starmer Frozen In Carbonite
WASHINGTON — In a grand gesture aimed at reaffirming the Special Relationship…
Secret Service Replaces Range Targets With Photos Of Fellow Agents After Realizing It’s The Only Thing They Can Consistently Hit
WASHINGTON — Following a series of incidents in which multiple agents shot…
Biden Defends Ilhan Omar By Recounting His Own Harrowing Service In The Trenches Of World War 9
REHOBOTH BEACH, DELAWARE— Coming to the defense of Congresswoman Ilhan Omar following…
‘No Kings’ Protesters Clarify They Don’t Oppose Actual King Currently Visiting White House
WASHINGTON — Chaos erupted outside the White House gates as thousands of…
Democrats Condemn Shooter’s White Half For Trying To Assassinate Trump
WASHINGTON — Following the chaotic arrest of shooter Cole Allen, prominent Democratic…
Senate Leader John Thune Refuses To Bring SAVE Act To Floor, Citing Grave Danger Of Accidentally Winning Midterms
WASHINGTON—After returning from another three week vacation, Senate Majority Leader John Thune…
