Biden Says Americans Can Save Money On Groceries By Not Eating
WASHINGTON-- In an effort to combat the exorbitant cost of food, President Joe Biden announced his plan to help Americans save money at the supermarket by urging everyone to just…
Dr. Fauci Jealous After Liberals Exchange Him For President Zelensky Pillows
U.S.-- Millions of liberals across the United States have thrown out their Dr. Fauci pillows and replaced them with pillows of the current trendy guy President Volodymyr Zelensky, causing the…
Samuel L. Jackson To Play Zelensky In Upcoming Movie About Ukrainian President
HOLLYWOOD-- A new movie is set to hit the big screen this summer honoring the life of the greatest human to ever exist Volodymyr Zelensky, with outstanding black actor Samuel…
USA To Russia: ‘Only We’re Allowed To Commit War Crimes’
WASHINGTON-- In response to the accusations of indiscriminate attacks by Russian forces in Ukraine, the American government issued a stern response saying that only the United States is allowed to…
First Grader Nominated To Supreme Court After Providing Definition Of The Word ‘Woman’
WASHINGTON-- A first grade girl from Kansas has made history for becoming the youngest person ever nominated to the United States Supreme Court after explaining to Congress what a woman…
Arnold Schwarzenegger And Steven Seagal Settle Russia Ukraine Conflict On Big Screen
HOLLYWOOD-- Famous American movie actors Steven Seagal and Arnold Schwarzenegger have both recently weighed in on the conflict between Russia and Ukraine, with both Hollywood heavyweights picking a different side…
Liberals Beg For World War 3 With Russia So They Can Get Back To Their Starbucks By Noon
U.S.-- Liberals across the United States have been on social media begging President Joe Biden to start nuclear war with Russia and to do it quickly so they can hurry…
Hunter Biden’s Laptop Says It’s Running As A Democrat For US Congress
WASHINGTON-- Hunter Biden's laptop has just announced on its Twitter account that it has decided to throw its hat in the ring and run for United States Congress in the…
Dr. Fauci Contemplates Retiring To Be Able To Spend More Time Torturing Puppies
WASHINGTON-- America's favorite physician Dr. Fauci made a startling announcement this week, saying he's considering retiring from his top-paying government job to focus exclusively on torturing dogs and puppies in…
Trump Holds Beautiful Rally In Post Apocalyptic World After Biden Destroys Country From Nuclear War
WASHINGTON-- Immediately after President Joe Biden destroyed the world from getting into nuclear war with Russia and Iran, President Donald Trump held a rally in front of the vestiges of…
Disney’s Tigger Arrested For Crack Cocaine In Florida Sting Operation
ORLANDO, FLORIDA-- Florida police have arrested 69 individuals, including famous Disney character Tigger the tiger in a six-day undercover drug bust sting operation dubbed Operation Crack Head Characters. Tigger was…
Generous Congress Members Give Themselves Pay Raises In Support Of Ukraine
WASHINGTON-- To show their love and generosity toward the plight of Ukraine, United States members of Congress voted to give themselves a 21 percent raise in their salaries, claiming pay…
