Fly That Landed On Mike Pence’s Head Turns Down Offer To Be His Vice President
WASHINGTON-- Former VP Mike Pence has been in the spotlight lately after announcing that he is running for president in 2024 and has already made an offer to the fly…
Gov. Gavin Newsom Held Hostage By Garden Tools In Protest Of Him Banning Leaf Blowers And Lawnmowers
SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA-- Dozens of angry garden tools have taken Gavin Newsom hostage over his recent ban of gas-powered lawn equipment, saying they have no intentions of releasing the California governor…
CNN Creates New Network CNN 2.0 To Cover Up Scandals Of First CNN
ATLANTA, GEORGIA- With so many alleged sex scandals plaguing the world's most trusted news network CNN, executives came up with the ingenious idea of creating another network called CNN 2.0…
Whoopi Goldberg Returns To ‘The View’, Oh Wait, It’s Only Justin Trudeau In Blackface Again
NEW YORK, NEW YORK-- Millions of people were shocked and then confused after turning on The View this morning and seeing who they thought was Whoopi Goldberg back on set,…
Groundhog Day: COVID Virus Sees Its Shadow, So Another 6 Weeks Of Propaganda
PUNXSUTAWNEY, PENNSYLVANIA-- Famed celebrity COVID Virus emerged from its burrow early this morning and saw its shadow, thus declaring there would be another six weeks of mainstream media fearmongering propaganda.…
AOC Leaves Twitter After Accusing The Social Media Site Of Just Wanting To Date Her
NEW YORK, NEW YORK-- A distraught AOC confirmed that she has officially left Twitter and won't be returning anytime soon, saying she has anxiety over the social media site using…
Justin Trudeau Hides Out In AOC’s New York District Office Since She’s Never There Anyway
QUEENS, NEW YORK-- After fleeing from Canada to the United States to avoid giving his citizens freedom, Prime Minster Justin Trudeau found the perfect hiding spot inside AOC's empty New…
Biden Threatens To Resign As President If Joe Rogan Not Removed From Spotify
WASHINGTON-- The president of the United States Joe Biden has issued a serious ultimatum to streaming service Spotify, saying that if they don't remove Joe Rogan's podcast immediately then he…
Biden Considers Nominating Strong Black Woman Hillary Clinton To Supreme Court
WASHINGTON-- President Joe Biden has finally narrowed down his list of possible black females he intends to nominate to the Supreme Court to replace retiring Justice Breyer, with strong, empowered…
Canada Votes To Change National Anthem From ‘O Canada’ To Just The Sounds Of Trucks Honking
OTTAWA, CANADA-- As the truckers against mandates protest continues to gain international traction, numerous Canadian conservative MP politicians have introduced a bill to change Canada's national anthem from 'O Canada!"…
Justin Trudeau Channels Spirit Of Deceased Father Fidel Castro For Advice On How To Deal With Truckers
OTTAWA, CANADA-- With the Canadian trucker convoy of freedom getting closer and closer toward Ottawa, an extremely nervous Justin Trudeau was left with no other alternative but to channel the…
Oops! Plane Filled With Illegal Immigrants Mistakenly Shipped To Biden’s Delaware Home
WILMINGTON, DELAWARE-- A late-night flight carrying hundreds of illegal aliens were accidentally sent to Joe Biden's Delaware home early Saturday instead of all the major cities inside red states, drawing…
