Biden Swallows Pelosi’s Dentures After Their Passionate Kiss At White House
WASHINGTON-- A freak accident happened on Tuesday at the White House when President Joe Biden accidentally swallowed Nancy Pelosi's dentures during their intense kissing session while celebrating the fine job…
COVID Virus Jealous President Zelensky Getting All Media Attention
WORLD-- World famous celebrity COVID virus went off on a Twitter rant early this morning voicing its displeasure at all the media attention Ukraine's President Volodymyr Zelensky has been receiving…
CNN Tries Improving Ratings By Slapping Brian Stelter At End Of Each Show
ATLANTA, GEORGIA-- In an effort to improve sagging ratings, CNN has decided to use the same winning strategy as the Oscars did with Will Smith's attack on Chris Rock by…
Biden Congratulates Whoopi Goldberg On Her Nomination To Supreme Court
WASHINGTON-- After hearing of Ketanji Brown Jackson's confirmation to the Supreme Court, President Joe Biden immediately got on the White House phone and called actress Whoopi Goldberg to congratulate her…
Elon Musk Now Controls Twitter CEO’s Brain With Neuralink
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA-- Immediately after purchasing a 9.2% stake in Twitter, Elon Musk's first order of business was to take control of CEO Parag Agrawal's brain and make all his…
New York City Passes ‘Don’t Say Straight’ Bill In Response To Florida Law
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- Still fuming at Florida's recently passed "Don't Say Gay" legislation, Democrat-run New York City has responded by passing the "Don't Say Straight" bill which not…
Florida Officials Warn Residents Of Giant Rodent Peeping Into Children’s Windows At Night
ORLANDO, FLORIDA-- Government officials in Florida are warning parents to be on the lookout for a very large rodent that's been going around neighborhoods at night and peeping into the…
New Disney Park Rule Requires Mickey Mouse To Grope Your Children At Gate Entry
ORLANDO, FLORIDA-- In response to Florida's so-called "Don't Say Gay" bill, Disney vowed to overturn the legislation and has already implemented its own new demands in resistance to the bill,…
Cat Community Passes Controversial ‘Don’t Say Spay’ Bill
TALLAHASSEE, FLORIDA-- A large cat community in northern Florida passed a controversial bill Friday called the "Don't Say Spay" bill, causing immediate condemnation from feline spay rights groups who say…
Fox News Hires Will Smith As Reporter For All Biden Speeches
WASHINGTON-- Fox News Channel has recently hired Will Smith as their White House correspondent to confront President Joe Biden during all press briefings, saying they were impressed with the Hollywood…
CNN Says Newly Released Video Shows Trump Slapping Chris Rock, Not Will Smith
ATLANTA, GEORGIA-- Newly unearthed video was recently aired on America's most trusted news source CNN last night showing President Donald Trump walking up on stage at the Oscars and slapping…
Amy Schumer Hosts Oscars Alone After Eating Regina Hall And Wanda Sykes In Opening Monologue
HOLLYWOOD-- There was a small change in Sunday's Oscars ceremony when comedienne Amy Schumer was forced to host the awards show all alone after eating her two cohosts during the…
