FBI Goes Undercover As Ghosts To Stop Illegal Ghost Car Operation
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- With ghost car crimes becoming more prevalent…
‘We Can Do Starbucks While We’re Getting Nuked,’ Says Oblivious Woman Voting For Kamala
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA-- While sitting inside of a Starbucks drinking soy lattes,…
CNN: ‘Why Violent Illegal Haitians Taking Over Your Neighborhood And Eating Pets Is A Good Thing’
SPRINGFIELD, OHIO-- America's most trusted news source CNN has come to the…
Cats And Dogs Come Out In Support Of Trump After Kamala’s Illegal Haitian Immigrants Keep Eating Pets
U.S.-- As news keeps spreading that illegal Haitian immigrants brought in by…
FBI Monitoring Any Americans Who Refused To Watch Olympics Opening Pride Ceremony
U.S.-- Millions of Americans are now being monitored by the FBI after…
Bad Guy Eludes Secret Service By Jogging Up Mildly Sloped Ground
MILWAUKEE, WISCONSIN-- A rabble-rousing man who tried disrupting the RNC Convention as…
Dad Tells Kids Maybe Next Fourth Of July When Trump’s President They Can Afford More Than One Hot Dog Each
BAKERSFIELD, CALIFORNIA-- A local Dad named Biff McSquiggin had the unfortunate job…
Nationwide FBI Manhunt Underway To Find Pigeon That Pooped On Street Pride Mural
U.S.-- Federal authorities are warning Americans of a dangerous criminal currently on…
RIP: Millions Of Americans Vote To Replace George Floyd Statue With Sculpture Of Kabosu Meme Dog
U.S.-- There was sad news this week after it was reported that…
Boeing Promises Their New Line Of Hindenburg Airships Are Just As Safe As Their Planes
U.S.-- Facing national backlash after yet another plane malfunctioned this week, longtime…
FBI Starts Monitoring Christians To Make Sure No One’s Reading The New Testament
U.S.-- As part of the Antisemitism Awareness Act passed by a bipartisan…
Gavin Newsom Passes Bill Forcing Retailers To Offer Home Delivery To Shoplifters
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA-- As a way to ease the burden of hardworking…
