U.S.– Promises made, promises kept. President Donald Trump has averted yet another crisis, solving the egg shortage problem by placing shirtless photos of HHS Secretary RFK Jr. inside chicken coops across the country in an effort to get frigid hens to start producing.
During an executive order signing this morning, Trump fielded several questions from the press, including giving America the great news that chickens across the country have started producing billions of eggs thanks to the president’s ingenious idea to solve the egg shortage.
“We’ve solved the egg shortage crisis, and then some,” said Trump inside of the Oval Office with RFK Jr. standing directly behind him. “Under my leadership, I had pictures of our very talented, very handsome secretary of health, Mr. RFK Jr., placed inside chicken coops across the country this week. Already we’ve had millions of extra eggs produced the last few days alone. You’re going to see those egg prices drop almost immediately, probably going down to as low as ten cents a dozen.”
After reporters clapped and RFK Jr. took a bow, Trump continued saying, “We’re going to have so many eggs, people are going to get tired of eating them. Americans are going to say, ‘No Mr. President, please stop, we’re tired of eating so many eggs.”
According to agriculture experts, the reason chickens weren’t producing that many eggs over the last few months was because former President Biden had already placed shirtless pictures of former HHS Secretary Rachel Levine inside of chicken coops.
