Canada Intends To Recognize Itself As An Indian State, Says Mark Carney
OTTAWA, CANADA-- In preparation for the upcoming United Nations General Assembly in September, Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney proudly announced that Canada will formally recognize itself as an Indian state…
Liberal Meltdown Intensifies After Trump Declares August ‘National Sydney Sweeney American Eagle Jeans Ad Appreciation Month’
WASHINGTON-- In a move that has ignited a fresh firestorm of liberal outrage, President Donald Trump announced August "National Sydney Sweeney American Eagle Jeans Ad Appreciation Month," adding to the…
Scandal: Hulk Hogan Posthumously Canceled After Unearthed Receipt Reveals He Purchased ‘Colored’ TV Back In 1983
U.S.-- Only days after passing away at the age of 71, the late wrestling icon Hulk Hogan has once again been thrust into the center of racial controversy, after a…
CNN Reports Japanese Police Searching For White Male Who Destroyed Tokyo
TOKYO, JAPAN-- In a journalistic twist that almost everyone saw coming, America's most trusted news source CNN has reported that Japanese police are hunting a "White male suspect" who destroyed…
Keir Starmer Hitches Ride On Trump’s Air Force One After Tie Gets Caught In Plane Door In Scotland
TURNBERRY, SCOTLAND-- In yet another diplomatic mishap for the wildly unpopular British leader, UK Prime Minister Keir Starmer found himself soaring over the Highlands on the outside of President Donald…
British Citizens Skirt Online Safety Act By Trading Memes In Dark Alleys
UK-- As a way to circumvent the stringent new Online Safety Act, British citizens devised a quirky workaround to the Orwellian new law by trading memes in dark alleys and…
Kermit The Frog Converts To Radical Islam After Spending A Week’s Vacation In London’s Muslim Quarter
LONDON, UK-- After a mere seven-day vacation in a predominantly Muslim neighborhood of London, beloved children's icon Kermit the Frog has reportedly embraced radical Islam. Sources close to the amphibian…
Imprisoned George Santos Kicking Himself For Not Reading Nancy Pelosi’s Book ‘How To Make Millions Insider Trading And Get Away With It’
FAIRTON, NEW JERSEY-- As he sat in prison serving a seven year sentence for fraud, former New York Congressman George Santos expressed deep regret over his financial missteps, kicking himself…
WSJ Reveals Trump’s Secret Letter To Herbert The Pervert Discussing Deviant ‘Popsicle Parties’
U.S.– In the latest political scandal that may possibly cause earthshattering repercussions, the Wall Street Journal (WSJ) has unearthed a never-before-seen letter from President Donald Trump to Family Guy’s notorious…
Mark Carney Credits Speechwriter Porky Pig For His ‘Um-Uh-You Know’ Speeches
OTTAWA, CANADA-- During a Rideau Hall news conference where he vowed to start being more transparent, Prime Minister Mark Carney responded to a reporter's question about his horrible public speaking…
The Iron Sheik Ambushes Hulk Hogan As He Arrives In Heaven
HEAVEN-- After passing away at the age of 71-years-old, the iconic leg-dropping, bandana-wearing WWE superstar Hulk Hogan was immediately ambushed after ascending to the Pearly Gates by his number one…
Liberal Holds 10th Annual ‘Trump’s Going To Prison Any Minute Now’ Party
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA-- For the tenth consecutive year, local liberal and self-proclaimed “justice enthusiast” Karen Pritchard threw her much-anticipated “Trump’s Going to Prison Any Minute Now” party on Saturday, undeterred…
