LONDON, UK– Only hours after the historic Israel-Gaza peace deal, UK Prime Minister Keir Starmer was spotted receiving a bouquet of “Congratulations” flowers and “You Did It!” balloons outside 10 Downing Street yesterday, which sources confirm he purchased and addressed to himself. The narcissistic gesture comes after the historic Middle East peace treaty between Israel and Palestine brokered largely by U.S. President Donald Trump.
“This is a proud day for Britain, and mostly for me, personally,” Keir Starmer announced during a congratulatory ceremony, moments after dramatically unveiling the congratulatory balloons from a large novelty box labeled “From: Prime Minister, To: The Guy Who Fixed the Middle East.” “I’d like to take this opportunity to congratulate myself on a job well done, and to thank whomever it was that sent me these lovely flowers. At least someone recognizes my contributions.”
Critics point out that PM Starmer didn’t actually do anything to help negotiate peace in the Middle East, but rather worsened the situation by recognizing Palestine as a state.
Keir Starmer dismissed these criticisms, saying, “That’s rubbish. I was instrumental in masterminding this whole peace process, and someone sent me flowers as appreciation, and that’s what really matters. They even went so far as to write ‘To the Greatest Prime Minister of All Time-Kier.’ on the attached card.”
The Prime Minister was later seen practicing his Nobel Peace Prize acceptance speech in front of a mirror, adjusting his tie and repeating, “I’d like to thank myself, my incredible self, for this momentous achievement.”
