Rioters Struggle To Vandalize Already Ruined Los Angeles
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA — A coalition of anti-ICE far-leftists and Mexican nationalists…
IRS Reminds Paid ICE Protesters Earnings Still Count As Taxable Income
WASHINGTON — The Internal Revenue Service (IRS) issued a gentle but firm…
Somalis Quickly Surrender After ICE Threatens To Hand Them Over To Screeching Liberal White Women
MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA-- During a recent immigration raid in Minnesota, dozens of illegal…
Somali Parents Evict Lazy Son For Failing To Launch A Single Federal Fraud Scheme
MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA-- Furious and deeply disappointed Somali parents reportedly evicted their 26-year-old…
New California Mandate Requires ID To Prove You Are Under 12 Before Purchasing Tobacco
SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA-- California officials announced a sweeping new public health mandate this…
FBI Announces Historic Arrest Of 85-Year-Old Grandmother Who Cheated At Bingo
WASHINGTON-- In what is being hailed by absolutely no one as the…
Out-Of-Work Justin Trudeau Opens Fraudulent Minnesota Somali Daycare Center
MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA-- Former Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, reportedly unemployed and financially…
DOJ Arrests Mysterious Black Rectangle From Epstein Files, Pam Bondi Declares Case Closed
WASHINGTON-- In a stunning breakthrough that Attorney General Pam Bondi is calling…
CNN Viewer Switches To North Korean State TV For More Balanced Coverage
PROVIDENCE, RHODE ISLAND-- A longtime CNN viewer announced that she has stopped…
Kash Patel Concludes FBI Would Function Perfectly If Agents Stopped Following His Orders
WASHINGTON-- FBI Director Kash Patel announced Tuesday that the bureau’s recent struggles…
California Bans ‘Assault Matches’ And ‘High-Capacity Lighters’ To Combat Wildfires
SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA-- In a move to combat the state's annual wildfire apocalypse,…
ICE Lures Somalis Out Of Minnesota Homes Using Lightbulbs Duct-Taped To Broomsticks
ST. PAUL, MINNESOTA-- In a bold new tactic meant to ramp up…
