In New Book, Franklin The Turtle Doesn’t Recognize Canada Anymore
TORONTO, CANADA — In a startling shift from the gentle woodland life…
Shirtless RFK Jr. Demonstrates HHS Qualifications By Slamming Congressman Through Table
WASHINGTON — While getting fiercely grilled by Democrat Congressmembers during his first…
Democrats Release Most Damning Eric Swalwell Video Yet Of Him Leaving Shopping Cart In Parking Lot
WASHINGTON — Calling it the most disturbing evidence to date of a…
Irish Government Deploys Justin Trudeau To Restore Order To Trucker Protest
DUBLIN, IRELAND—With thousands of Irish truckers currently flooding the roadways to protest…
Criminals Accuse Other Criminals Of Being Criminals
WASHINGTON—Expressing feigned shock that a fellow member of the ruling class would…
Trump Releases Official Limited-Edition Gold Nuclear Fallout Masks
WASHINGTON — As global tensions continue to rise over the escalating conflict…
UK Unveils New Culturally Sensitive Easter Bunny
LONDON, UK — In a move to promote inclusivity during the Easter…
Nation’s Elite Pedophiles Send Fired Pam Bondi Tearful ‘Sorry To See You Go’ Card
WASHINGTON—Calling her the best friend the predator class has ever had, the…
Eric Swalwell Claims He Couldn’t Have Slept With Fang Fang Because She’s A Woman
WASHINGTON — In a stunning new defense against allegations that he had…
Trump Tells American Children Iran Executed The Easter Bunny
WASHINGTON — In a solemn and deeply moving Easter week address, President…
Biden Volunteers For TSA Duty So He Can Legally Grope Women Again
WASHINGTON — Citing his deep commitment to public service, former President Joe…
Laid-Off TSA Agent Gets New Job Aggressively Patting Down Customers At Walmart Exit
PHOENIX, ARIZONA — Following recent federal budget cuts that left thousands of…