Tag: Rated PG

Grand Moff Tarkin Claims He Gave People Of Alderaan Two Minutes To Evacuate Before Blowing Up Planet

WORLD-- In order to stop the Rebel Alliance and bring order to…

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Biden Dresses Up As Bloodsucking Vampire For Halloween

WASHINGTON-- For this year's Halloween festivities, the White House has confirmed that…

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Israel Tortures Hamas Prisoners By Forcing Them To Listen To Videos Of Ben Shapiro Babbling On Incessantly

TEL AVIV, ISRAEL-- Dozens of world leaders as well as various humanitarian…

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With Palestine In News, Biden Keeps Thinking There Was Some Place He Was Supposed To Go Visit

WASHINGTON-- As the word "Palestine" keeps getting repeated ad nauseam on news…

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UFC Hires Bud Light Spokesperson Dylan Mulvaney To Attract More Diverse Fans

LAS VEGAS, NEVADA-- In an effort to try and attract a much…

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Israel Makes War Friendlier By Putting Smiley Faces On Bombs Before Dropping Them

GAZA-- In an effort to make the horrors of war a little…

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Netanyahu Announces Israel’s Invasion Of Poland

TEL AVIV, ISRAEL-- Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu gave a fiery speech on…

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Biden Flies To Israel To Check In With His Boss

TEL AVIV, ISRAEL-- A worried and subservient President Joe Biden flew to…

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Gavin Newsom Stands In Solidarity With Israel By Shutting Off Water And Electricity To Californians

SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA-- As the war in the Middle East continues to escalate,…

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Eric Swalwell Falls Madly In Love With AOC After She Farts Out Seductive Mating Call

WASHINGTON-- During a recent livestream discussing the brutal war between Israel and…

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Congress Introduces New Updated American Flag That’s More Representative Of The United States

WASHINGTON-- Due to both their undying support and subservience to multiple foreign…

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