Foot Jobs Are A Great Start For Teen Girls
ORLANDO, FLORIDA-- Have you ever wondered how some teens get their feet wet in the professional world, gaining experience for a lifetime of employment? Long gone are the days of lazy teen…
The Art Of Bush
I went to see Pop today. Shucks, I'd be lyin if I told ya I wasn't a bit nervous this time. Heck, don't get me wrong, I visit Pop every chance I…
Mother Sues Baby For Painful Childbirth
BEAVER DAM, KENTUCKY-- Typically, giving birth to a newborn baby is one of the greatest and most rewarding events that can happen in a young mother's life, but not for…
Dear Trump
Dear Trump: Wife torn about future job position: DEAR TRUMP: I'm very excited about my wife's possible chance at becoming the very first female president of the United States, being that…
D-List Celebrities Threaten To Quit If Trump Wins
HOLLYWOOD-- A group of talented D-list celebrities has threatened to quit show-business altogether and get real jobs if Donald Trump is elected as president of the United States, placing the…
German Shepherd Marries Owner To Avoid Deportation
DENVER, COLORADO-- A German Shepherd married his owner on Sunday in a quickie Vegas wedding after authorities threatened to send the dog back to Germany because of an expired canine visa. In an…
Tat-shaming On The Rise
SEATTLE, WASHINGTON-- Adding to the already excessive name-calling and rudeness that is ubiquitous anywhere normal people are gathered together, tat-shaming is becoming one of the most prevalent means of making fun of people, surpassing…
Bollywood Actress Under Fire For Overcooking Hamburger
MUMBAI, INDIA-- A famous Bollywood actress is in hot water with the strict Indian Hindu community after overcooking a hamburger, causing millions of Kosher Hindus to boycott the actress's films, commercials,…
Syrian Refugee Elected As German Chancellor
HAMBURG, GERMANY-- In a stunning defeat to become the new chancellor of Germany, a 19 year old male Syrian refugee named Houmam Rasha Lamma-Dayoub has defeated former chancellor Angela Merkel…
U.S. Has Millions Of Sink Holes, Says Expert
CHATTANOOGA, TENNESSEE-- A seismology expert out of Chattanooga has been making the news this week after his discovery that the United States has millions of sink holes and citizens are…
Brain-Eating Amoebae Starve Inside Al Sharpton’s Head
BROWNSTAIN, NEW YORK-- In what the medical establishment is calling nothing short of a miracle, the Reverend Al Sharpton has defied all odds and pulled through a severe attack from…
Goldilocks Goes On Maury After Getting Pregnant
STAMFORD, CONNECTICUT-- Famous child star Goldilocks recently appeared on The Maury Povich Show after finding out that she had become pregnant, claiming that the father is definitely one of The…
