D.C. Swamp Holds Candlelight Vigil For Ousted RINO Republicans
WASHINGTON — In a rare, tearful display of true bipartisan solidarity, thousands…
Karen Bass Attempts To Win Back Voters By Dropping Out Of Race
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA — Hoping to breathe new life into a struggling…
Miriam Adelson And John Paulson Formally Awarded Co-Custody Of Ed Gallrein Following Successful Primary Adoption
HEBRON, KENTUCKY — In a touching scene that restored faith in the…
Ed Gallrein Assures Voters He Only Followed OnlyFans Model To Keep An Eye On The ‘Moral Decay Of America’
HEBRON, KENTUCKY — Facing intense scrutiny just as voters head to the…
Shocking Accusation: Whistleblower Claims Thomas Massie Hung Toilet Paper In ‘Under’ Position During 2018 Dinner Party
FRANKFORT, KENTUCKY — The increasingly bitter Kentucky Republican primary descended into unprecedented territory…
Arsonists Of America Endorse Karen Bass For L.A. Mayor
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA — Citing her inspiringly hands-off approach to combustion, the…
After Careful Reflection, Keir Starmer Concludes Massive Labour Defeat Caused By Everyone Except Keir Starmer
LONDON, UK — Following a disastrous week of local election results that…
Katie Porter Tries To Woo Suburban Moms By Berating Babies
IRVINE, CALIFORNIA — In a desperate bid to humanize her image ahead…
Dead Voters Beg Congress To Pass SAVE Act So They Can Finally Rest In Peace
U.S. —Citing extreme exhaustion and a desperate desire for eternal slumber, a…
Lindsey Graham Announces Reelection Campaign For Senator Of Israel
COLUMBIA, SOUTH CAROLINA — Standing before a sea of blue and white…
Mark Carney Scolds Canadians For Electing Such An Awful Prime Minister
OTTAWA, CANADA-- In what he has called one of the biggest blunders…
Ex-Con Believes His Extensive Criminal History Will Make Him An Excellent Addition To Congress
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA-- Only days after Nancy Pelosi announced her retirement from…