‘All Citizens Must Take The Vaccine!’ Say Politicians Who Are Exempt From Their Own Illegal Mandates
WASHINGTON-- The majority of the U.S. Congress has been on the warpath lately to get every single American vaccinated whether they want to or not, saying that there's nothing underhanded…
Joe Biden To Star In Breathtaking Upcoming Bollywood Movie ‘I Pooped In Punjab’
MUMBAI, INDIA-- US President Joe Biden has recently wrapped up filming his upcoming steamy Bollywood movie I Pooped In Punjab, which is set in India and will have a theatrical…
Heads Up: France On Lockdown As Explosive Bird Crap Drops In Europe And Asia
PARIS, FRANCE-- Several outbreaks of severe bird poop downpours in Europe and Asia have been reported this week to the World Organization for Animal Defecation, in a sign that the…
LeBron James Tries Proving He’s Not A Crybaby By Cutting An Onion On Prerecorded Video
SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA-- After being called a hypocrite for mocking Kyle Rittenhouse for crying in court, basketball player LeBron James decided to prove to his critics that he himself never cries…
Due To Supply Shortages, Supermarkets Start Selling ‘I Did That’ Biden Stickers On Empty Shelves
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA-- Supermarkets across the US are resorting to creative ways to cover up their massive amount of empty shelves, and are now selling the popular "I Did That"…
Police Arrest Provocative Cat For Licking Itself While Out In Public
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- A local cat named Frisky was arrested for allegedly licking itself out in public near a high school in New York on Thursday, police said.…
Kamala Harris Tells People Of France She Loves Their Authentic French Fries And French Toast
PARIS, FRANCE-- After heading all the way to France to get a genuine French manicure, Vice President Kamala Harris stopped to talk to the dozens of French citizens who were…
Biden Blames Anti-Vaxxers For Causing The US To Lose World War 5 In Riveting Veteran’s Day Speech
ARLINGTON COUNTY, VIRGINIA-- President Joe Biden paid tribute to the nation's veterans with a stoic speech by reaffirming his position that if everyone had just gotten the COVID jab then…
In Honor Of Veteran’s Day, Biden Adds Statue Of War Hero Admiral Rachel Levine To Marine Corps Memorial
ARLINGTON COUNTY, VIRGINIA-- In honor of Veteran's Day, President Joe Biden decided to mark the special occasion by adding a statue of Admiral Rachel Levine, a rugged wartime hero and…
Ted Cruz Reveals Startling Evidence Proving Big Bird Is Secretly Working For Communist China
WASHINGTON-- Texas Senator Ted Cruz has just revealed shocking new evidence about Big Bird on his official Twitter account this morning proving that the beloved Sesame Street character is in…
Sesame Street’s Elmo Rushed To Emergency Room Only Days After Bragging About Being Vaccinated
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- Only days after telling the world how he was excited to get the COVID shot, famous Muppet character Elmo was rushed to the emergency room…
Major Nationwide Comcast Outage After Clumsy CEO Trips Over Main Power Cord
PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA-- Millions of Comcast customers across the country woke up this morning to a major service outage, causing significant problems around the US and prompting Xfinity to admit that…
