WASHINGTON– Immediately after the guilty verdict was handed down to Donald Trump in his hush money case, former President Barack Hussein Obama and failed presidential candidate Hillary Clinton celebrated the momentous occasion by committing some of their old crimes such as killing innocent civilians with drone strikes and deleting thousands of confidential email evidence.
Obama and Hillary were all giddy as they watched the guilty verdict being read in the Trump porn star case, which led to them committing a few of their crimes with impunity knowing they’ll never be held accountable.
“Oops, there’s another one,” said Obama with a smile as he launched a drone missile into a Christian church. “I love being able to do whatever the hell I want and not have to worry about facing punishment because the so-called justice departments in this country are on our side and even more corrupt than we are.”
Hillary furrowed her wrinkled brow and said, “Wait, hold on, Barack. What do you mean more corrupt than us? I take offense to that. No one’s more corrupt than I am, not even you. I mean, how many dead bodies do you have tied to you like I do?”
Not wanting to be left out of the group, President Biden joined in on the celebratory festivity by upping his cut of the Ukraine money laundering scam to 15% for the Big Guy.