WASHINGTON– Amid recent news that the president gave the greenlight to his DOJ to have Donald Trump arrested, Joe Biden gave a news conference and bragged that he’ll very easily win the 2024 presidential election once he has all of his closest political opponents locked up on bogus charges.
“No, I’m not worried about losing the next election,” said Biden with confidence to reporters while swinging a pair of handcuffs to intimidate both his Republican and Democrat opponents. “My handlers tell me that I won’t even need to campaign and I get to spend every day down in my basement eating ice cream.”
Biden confirmed that his fellow Democrats should also worry about facing prison time, signaling that his DOJ gestapo will be silencing Democratic candidate Robert Kennedy, Jr as well due to RFK’s rising poll numbers and refusal to take a bribe and drop out like Bernie Sanders did twice.
“My patience is wearing thin with this anti-vaxxer Kellerman, I mean Kaufman, no Kennedy,” said Biden in reference to his main Democrat competition RFK, Jr. “And if that Dr. Jill Stern, or Stein, girl doesn’t bow out and let me win the race then I’ll lock her up in prison too, Jack.”
In response to Biden weaponizing federal law enforcement to lock up numerous politicians including Trump, Republicans in the House tweeted on Twitter X how angry they were and also promised to write a few stern letters with lots of capital letters about how mean Biden is.
