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Home » WORLD » Massive Earthquake In Russia Kills People’s Mood

WORLD

Massive Earthquake In Russia Kills People’s Mood

Daily Soak Staff
Last updated: October 3, 2021 9:22 pm
Daily Soak Staff
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A broken statue in Russia after a massive earthquake.
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SAROV, RUSSIA– The catastrophic earthquake that hit the large farming town of Sarov, Russia on Friday, has totally killed hundreds of people’s moods and the mood-kill toll is expected to rise. 

At least 300 people’s moods were killed and another 800 people were slightly disgruntled, according to Russian reporter Yankoff Cockovich from Russia’s largest news station Krem DeLa Krem.

“We’re still tallying up the totals,” Cockovich stated on Russian television through English subtitles. “There’s probably at least another hundred survivors who only had their feelings hurt.

“It was the worst experience of my happy life,” survivor Viktor Goesthespoilskov said through a translator about the earthquake that rattled his emotions Friday as he relaxed inside his warm bathtub. “After the earthquake everyone was screaming and saying that their feelings were hurt. Thank God I was one of the lucky ones who didn’t have my mood totally killed. I have a date tonight and I’d hate to lose my confidence.”

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The magnitude 6.9 earthquake hit Sarov Friday night as it upset multiple people and made them miserable, authorities said.

“People still don’t feel like having any fun,” Cockovich told a Daily Soak correspondent through the television set. 

President Vladimir Putin has confirmed that the mood-kill toll will rise and in response he has placed the large town in a state of happy-time.

“I want the people to know that I’m here if you need to laugh,” said Putin, making funny faces into the camera during an interview. “I’m not just your president, but also your clown.”

Russian president Vladimir Putin wearing a spacesuit.
Finding out early that the earthquake was imminent, Putin launched into space to avoid the catastrophe.

Pope Francis has called on all the world’s leaders to come together and pray for the uplifting of everyone’s moods and to say that Trump’s not a Christian for being in a good mood throughout the awful tragedy.

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⚠️ This highly acclaimed article is satire.

TAGGED:DeadDonald TrumpEarthquakeInterviewMental HealthPopeRated GRussiaVladimir Putin

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