Physician’s Hippocratic Oath Updated To ‘First, Do As Pfizer Says’ To Reflect Modern Medicine
CHICAGO, ILLINOIS-- To better reflect the state of current modern medical practice, the AMA has…
Kamala Promises To Build Border Wall, Only It’ll Be Invisible And People Can Still Walk Through It
EL PASO, TEXAS-- In yet another complete 180 degree turnaround from her previous far-left policies,…
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Ron DeSantis Proposes 6-Hour Abortion Ban If Elected President
TALLAHASSEE, FLORIDA-- During a campaign stop in California, Republican Presidential candidate Ron DeSantis unveiled some…
Unorthodox Meteorologist Predicts The Weather Correctly Every Time (NSFW)
JASPER, WASHINGTON-- Think predicting the weather is difficult? For most meteorologists it is, but for…
Israel Builds Holocaust Museum For Holocaust Museum
TEL AVIV, ISRAEL-- At a meeting inside of the holocaust museum Yad Vashem on Rabin…
Biden Prepares For Nuclear World War 3 By Stockpiling Tampons, Makeup, And Hormones
WASHINGTON-- As tensions between countries continue to escalate, Joe Biden has taken a proactive approach…
Waiting For Your Girl To Finish Putting Makeup On Meme
😃 MEME: Me waiting for my girlfriend to finish putting makeup on just to drive…
In Push For Diversity, Chick-Fil-A Will Now Serve Black Chickens
ATLANTA, GEORGIA-- Striving to be more diverse and equitable, the Chairman of Chick-fil-A Dan Cathy…
BuzzFeed Articles Suddenly Improve After Company Hires Chimpanzees As Writers
NEW YORK, NEW YORK-- After laying off hundreds of useless human writers and then hiring…
Heads Up: France On Lockdown As Explosive Bird Crap Drops In Europe And Asia
PARIS, FRANCE-- Several outbreaks of severe bird poop downpours in Europe and Asia have been…
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Brazilian Scientists Discover New Species In Amazon Rainforest They’ve Now Identified As Bidenus Pedophilelis
BRAZIL, SOUTH AMERICA-- The scientific world is abuzz with excitement after scientists in Brazil recently discovered a new species while…
Congress Reassures Americans They Will Do Everything In Their Power To Ignore The Will Of The People
WASHINGTON-- With President-Elect Donald Trump set to take office in January, members of Congress have reassured unsure American voters that…
Party That Believes Men Can Get Pregnant Claims RFK Jr. Is Anti-Science
U.S.-- Democrats have been in an uproar since President-Elect Donald Trump nominated former Independent candidate RFK Jr. to be the…
Almost 90-Year-Old Nancy Pelosi Emerges From Her Coffin To Win Reelection To Congress
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA-- Almost 90-year-old former House Speaker and current ghoul Nancy Pelosi emerged from her coffin to win her…
California Announces They Should Be Finished Counting 2024 Election Ballots By Next Election
SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA-- Still counting ballots almost two weeks after Election Day, California election officials have reassured Americans that they should…
Whoopi Goldberg Claims Two Muscular Men Dumped Raw Milk On Her And Yelled ‘This Is MAHA Country’
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- The View host Whoopi Goldberg made a startling revelation on the ABC talk show this…
Taylor Swift’s New Album Made Entirely Of Silence Becomes Top Selling Album Of All Time
U.S.-- Pop star Taylor Swift has made history once again after her latest music album Silence, which contains no music…
