Biden: ‘If The Supreme Court Pick’s Not Corrupt, Then You Ain’t My Nominee!’
WASHINGTON-- With the sudden announcement of Supreme Court Justice Stephen Breyer's retirement, Joe Biden began going through a list of qualifications he's looking for in the future SCOTUS replacement, saying…
Vladimir Putin Trolls Biden By Putting ‘I Did That’ Stickers To The Front Of Russian Tanks
MOSCOW, RUSSIA-- As tensions between the United States and Russia heat up, President Vladimir Putin sent a clear message to Joe Biden by placing the famous "I Did That" Biden…
Dangerous Lab Monkey That Escaped From Pennsylvania Truck Crash Spotted In Washington, DC
WASHINGTON-- After three lab monkeys escaped their trailer when the delivery truck crashed on a Pennsylvania highway, one of the most dangerous primates was spotted in Washington, DC giving an…
Thousands Of Canada Geese Join Truckers Against Mandates By Blocking Justin Trudeau’s Home Driveway
OTTAWA, CANADA-- Thousands of angry Canada geese have joined in the convoy of truckers protest against vaccine mandates by flying to the home of Prime Minister Justin Trudeau and then…
Physician’s Hippocratic Oath Updated To ‘First, Do As Pfizer Says’ To Reflect Modern Medicine
CHICAGO, ILLINOIS-- To better reflect the state of current modern medical practice, the AMA has changed the original core lines of the Hippocratic Oath from "First, do no harm" to…
Biden Weighs Sending Thousands Of Cross-Dressing Troops To Strike Fear Into Russia
WASHINGTON-- In an effort to scare President Vladimir Putin into backing off from attacking, Joe Biden declared that he's mulling over the idea of sending thousands of cross-dressing soldiers from…
Frustrated Looters Now Mad At Biden Because They Can’t Rob Empty Shelves
U.S.-- As the Biden supply chain crisis worsens by the day, America's looters have become disenchanted with the direction the president is taking the country and are now blaming him…
Brave NYPD Arrests Newborn Baby For Not Having Her Vaccine Card Inside Hospital
NEW YORK, NEW YORK-- Brave NYPD police officers stopped another dangerous anti-vaxxer from infecting anyone when they forcibly arrested a newborn baby almost immediately after the mother finished giving birth.…
Furious Transgender Swimmer Cries ‘It’s Not Fair’ After UPenn Allows Dolphin To Compete On Swim Team
PHILADELPHIA, PENNSYLVANIA-- In an ironic twist, the transgender swimmer who recently destroyed all the girl's records at a meet last month is now calling out the University of Pennsylvania's unfair…
Vampire In New Blade Movie Being Recast As Pansexual Werewolf
HOLLYWOOD-- In an effort to be more dynamic and inclusive, the producers for the upcoming Blade reboot have decided to scrap the traditional straight, black vampire character in favor of…
M&Ms Faces Major Backlash After Introducing New Straight White Male Character
HACKETTSTOWN, NJ-- Mars, Incorporated is facing major backlash from progressives after the M&Ms candy company recently introduced a new straight, white male character in an effort to be more inclusive,…
CNN’s Brian Stelter Gets Brutally Roasted Once Again By Cursing Callers
https://youtu.be/tFlLvq0BElE (SATIRE) CNN’s Brian Stelter was once again in the hot seat as livid viewers called in and were even more brutally honest about their feelings toward him than they…
