Biden Tells American Children Putin Murdered The Easter Bunny
WASHINGTON-- In an emotional speech Thursday, President Joe Biden informed the millions of young children in the United States that Russian President Vladimir Putin has killed the beloved Easter Bunny…
US Congress Makes Pledge Of Allegiance To President Zelensky Mandatory Inside Schools
WASHINGTON-- In a unanimous bipartisan move, members of Congress passed a bill that made it mandatory for all schools across the United States to hang images of Ukraine President Zelensky…
World’s Most Knowledgeable Man Bill Gates Gives His Expert Opinion On Russia Ukraine Situation
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA-- World scholar and expert on everything Bill Gates gave his much-needed opinion on the current war between Russia and Ukraine, explaining that the conflict is definitely something…
World Cheers After Obama Makes History As America’s First Black President With COVID
WASHINGTON-- News outlets have reported that former President Barack Obama has made another historical milestone after he contracted the deadly COVID, making him the first stunning black American president to…
Biden Administration Suggests Pushing Your Vehicles Around To Save On Gas
WASHINGTON-- With gas prices reaching an all-time high ever since he took office, President Joe Biden has advised concerned Americans to start pushing their vehicles everywhere they go as a…
US Government Makes Ukraine 51st State Of America
WASHINGTON-- To better protect Ukraine and also Biden's shady business dealings, President Joe Biden signed a special proclamation Sunday admitting the country of Ukraine into the Union as the 51st…
NYPD Police Beat And Arrest Man Inside Home For Using Russian Salad Dressing
NEW YORK, NEW YORK-- A New York man was forcibly arrested inside his home Saturday after a neighbor reported him for allegedly using Russian salad dressing on his lunch, which…
Biden Administration Really Sticks It To Russia By Letting American People Starve To Death
WASHINGTON-- The Biden Administration has informed US citizens that the best way to get back at Russia and teach them a lesson is to take everything away from the American…
Urgent: White House Confirms Russia Responsible For Biden Pooping His Pants
WASHINGTON-- The White House has issued an emergency statement saying that the Russians have hacked President Joe Biden's colon causing him to crap his pants on multiple occasions, according to…
Banks Set Up Satellite Offices At Gas Stations For People To Take Out Loans To Pay For Gas
U.S.-- Major banking institutions have been setting up satellite offices at gas stations across the United States for customers who would like to take out loans to help them pay…
Russia Hires Actor Steven Seagal To Defeat Entire Ukrainian Army In Less Than Two Hours
MOSCOW, RUSSIA-- President Vladimir Putin of Russia has recently hired Hollywood actor Steven Seagal to use his world-class martial arts skills to easily defeat the entire Ukrainian army in less…
Gas Prices Are So High Even Biden’s Putting ‘I Did That’ Stickers On Gas Pumps
WASHINGTON-- Gas prices within the United States have gone up so much this past year that even President Joe Biden started placing the famous "I Did That" Biden stickers on…
