In New Book, Franklin The Turtle Doesn’t Recognize Canada Anymore
TORONTO, CANADA — In a startling shift from the gentle woodland life…
Keir Starmer Demands Investigation Into Prime Minister’s Handling Of UK
LONDON, UK — Prime Minister Keir Starmer has called for an urgent…
Irish Government Deploys Justin Trudeau To Restore Order To Trucker Protest
DUBLIN, IRELAND—With thousands of Irish truckers currently flooding the roadways to protest…
Canadians Wondering When Real Prime Minister Going To Show Up
CANADA—Expressing a quiet, shared assumption that the current situation was temporary, millions…
UK Unveils New Culturally Sensitive Easter Bunny
LONDON, UK — In a move to promote inclusivity during the Easter…
British Man Hit By Bus Apologizes To Bus For Being In The Way
LONDON, UK — Traffic in Central London ground to a halt Tuesday…
Pharisees Hold First-Ever ‘No Kings’ Protest Against Jesus
JERUSALEM — Tensions reached a boiling point in the streets of Jerusalem…
Costco Canada Now Offering Bulk Euthanasia Packages For The Whole Family
OTTAWA, CANADA—In a move to further streamline the most successful healthcare initiative…
After Discovering He’s Gay, Iran’s Supreme Leader Throws Himself Off Rooftop As Punishment
TEHRAN, IRAN — In a shocking act of ideological consistency, Iran’s new…
Israel Releases Undoctored Photo Of Benjamin Netanyahu To Prove He’s Still Alive
JERUSALEM, ISRAEL — Attempting to calm a growing online frenzy about the…
Canadian Man Finally Reaches Front Of ER Line Just In Time For Autopsy
TORONTO, ONTARIO — After what Canada Health described as a triumph of administrative…
Keir Starmer Torn Between Arresting People For Tweets And Arresting Them Before They Tweet
LONDON, UK — Government sources say Prime Minister Keir Starmer is currently…
