OTTAWA, ONTARIO — Wiping away tears during a deeply emotional, nationally televised address from Parliament Hill this morning, Prime Minister Mark Carney used his annual Canada Day speech to express his profound, heartfelt gratitude to the millions of recent Indian immigrants who have finally succeeded in replacing the nation’s decreasing White people.
Standing before a massive group of newly imported international students from Punjab, the emotional Prime Minister reflected on the beautiful realization of his ultimate geopolitical dream.
“They said it couldn’t be done,” Mark Carney whispered, his voice cracking with emotion as he looked out over a crowd entirely devoid of anyone whose ancestors built the Trans-Canada Railway. “They told me that completely replacing the foundational demographic of a G7 nation using mass, unchecked student visas and fast-track hospitality permits would take centuries. But look at us now. We did it in under a decade.”
After wiping away a few tears, Carney added, “To the millions of international students and temporary workers who have stepped up to completely alter our demographic reality in just a few short years: thank you. A grateful nation salutes you.”
During his speech, Carney highlighted the unique cultural benefits the new Indian demographic reality has brought to the nation, praising the complete transformation of Southern Ontario into a thriving hub of strip-mall diploma mills, basement sweatshops, trash, crime, and outdoor defecation.
When asked by reporters what the remaining White population of Canada should do to celebrate the holiday, Mark Carney urged the few remaining legacy White Canadians to celebrate their heritage privately, perhaps by quietly eating a plain boiled potato in their homes, so as not to disturb the new growing majority.


