RENO, NEVADA– Republican presidential candidate Nikki Haley suffered a major loss last night in the Nevada primary after losing bigly to her challenger known only as ‘None of these Candidates.”
After destroying Haley by over twenty thousand votes, None of these Candidates will now move ahead to face off against frontrunner former President Donald J. Trump, who was quick to both castigate and congratulate his opponents.
“It was a bad night for Nikki Haley,” wrote Trump on his Truth Social account. “Birdbrain Haley thinks she can beat me when she can’t even beat a guy who doesn’t even exist, who by the way, destroyed her last night. Congratulations to None of these Candidates and I look forward to not seeing him or Haley in the future.”
Not much is known about None of these Candidates, other than the fact that he came out of nowhere to defeat Haley in the Nevada Republican primary. None of these Candidates is also a former actor who had a small role in the 1985 Richard Pryor movie Brewster’s Millions, but went by his entertainment name “None of the Above” back then.
Haley accused the primary of being rigged, saying how can None of these Candidates beat her when he hasn’t even been campaigning or taking part in any of the primary debates. None of these Candidates fired back and said even though he does not exist he’s more real than Haley.
