LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA– Pop singer Madonna has gone on record to voice her displeasure with the top Republican candidate and has promised that if Donald Trump becomes president of the United States then she will punish American voters by putting out a new music album.
The Like A Virgin singer took to social media to tell everyone that they better not vote Trump into office or they’ll be forced to watch and listen to the 65-year-old Madonna’s upcoming Still A Virgin record, tours, and videos that will include lots and lots of aging senior citizen skin grinding all over a stage.
“If Trump becomes president again I swear you’ll regret it,” wrote Madonna on Instagram with an attached photo of a certain part of her body. “If the orange man wins then I’ll be left with no choice but to put out my new album, Still A Virgin, where I don’t use any auto-tune and I wear even less clothes than I did forty years ago when I did the original Like A Virgin.”
Millions of Americans have stated that they are still voting for Trump, but also said they have slight reservations due to the fact that they may accidentally hear one of Madonna’s new songs or might be looking through social media and mistakenly see the elder Material Girl twerking almost naked.
Numerous other boomer musicians have joined Madonna in promising that they too will release new cringeworthy music if Trump becomes the 47th president, including Bruce Springsteen, Barbara Streisand, Cher, and Neil Young.
Madonna, please don’t.
Good time to be blind.