HOLLYWOOD, CALIFORNIA– In order to focus more of his attention on calling for the unvaccinated to die, comedian Jimmy Kimmel began replaying his opening late-show monologue from 2016 where he assured his trained seal audience that President Donald Trump will be going to prison very, very soon.
“The orange buffoon Trump will be going to prison any second now,” said Kimmel on the 2016 opening monologue that he replayed once again last night. “Trump is a criminal and the walls are definitely closing in on him this time. Mark my words, by next year this time we’ll be seeing Trump dressed in an orange prison jumpsuit.”
The Jimmy Kimmel Live! host went on to promise his ten viewers that “They’re coming for Trump,” but wouldn’t elaborate any further on who “they” are.
“I don’t wanna spoil the shock on Trump’s face when ‘they’ break down his door to arrest him,” said Kimmel while stagehands flashed “please clap” signs to the audience. “They are definitely not coming for me because the Jeffrey Epstein files are pure conspiracy theory. In fact, Jeffrey Epstein never even existed, but he was simply a figment of all those Trump-worshipper’s imaginations.”
In a future Jimmy Kimmel Live! episode from the year 2043, Kimmel gave a rare opening monologue where he promised that now 96-year-old Trump will be going to prison any second now.
