WASHINGTON- Immediately after calling all the January 6 patriots “terrorists”, Senator Ted Cruz shocked the world even further by removing his mask on the Senate floor and revealing himself to have been Ted Cruz all along.
Millions of Republicans watched in horror as Cruz exposed his true identity, confusing even some of the Texas senator’s diehard fans who believed that he was not a real politician.
“Yes, that’s correct, I was pretending to be Ted Cruz all along,” said a laughing Cruz as he threw the mask down on the floor during the January 6 speech. “I know this comes as a shock to the American people, but yes, I am a career politician.”
Many disappointed Americans took to social media to voice their disbelief that Cruz was a typical politician who throws his supporters under the bus and takes money from corrupt donors.
Once word got out that his reputation and future presidential dreams were at stake, Cruz put his Cruz mask back on and told Fox News host Tucker Carlson that he made a mistake by letting his mask slip while on camera.
“It was a mistake to show my real character yesterday and I regret making that sloppy and frankly dumb error,” said Cruz with a smile, promising to try harder to pretend he’s one of the good guys from now on, at least on camera.
Ted Cruz is just another corrupt politician.
This is why I like this site, cause Daily Soak pokes fun at everyone. That other popular satire site never calls out the corrupt Republicans, even though the Republicans are almost as bad as the Democrats because they pretend like they’re on our side.