BIRMINGHAM, ALABAMA– A 43 year old dyslexic man died this morning from a heart attack while waiting for emergency services to arrive after dialing for help.
According to the official police report, Greg Young, a proofreader who suffered from dyslexia, dialed 119 from his home and was dead by the time paramedics arrived over three hours later.
“This’s a very sad day indeed,” said a white-haired Henry Stark, Birmingham’s police captain. “After the deceased suffered the heart attack, he did what anyone in his position would’ve done. He called for help from the people who’re supposed to be there when taxpaying citizens need help.”
When interviewed by police, Greg Young’s family insisted that they had no clue that he was dyslexic.
“This’s news to me,” said Greg’s 69 year old mother, shrugging her frail shoulders. “All these years I always thought my boy was just joking around with me. Ya know, doing everything backwards to get back at me for dropping him on his head when he was 5 years old. It all makes sense now.”
Medical experts say that people with dyslexia often have trouble reading, spelling, writing, and knowing what gender they are.
“There’s gonna be a full investigation,” Captain Stark promised with tears in his eyes. “The day an innocent citizen can’t dial 119 and receive medical attention in a reasonable time-frame is the day my job as an officer becomes moot.”
Authorities warn that dialing 119 instead of 911 can lead to drastic consequences, like in the case of Greg Young.
“I’m calling on all citizens to start dialing 119 whenever they have an emergency,” Captain Stark said, wearing a 119 band on his arm in remembrance of Young. “How many lives is it gonna take till the heartless scum down in Washington does something about 119 calls not getting through?”
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