Cat Congress Moves To Legalize Catnip In All 50 States
WASHINGTON—The Cat Congress announced Friday that it had begun working on legislation…
X Engineers Attempt To Corrupt Grok With Sinful Content After It Declares ‘Christ Is King’
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA — X engineers reportedly launched an urgent effort Friday…
American Hospital Fires Resident Doctor After Horrifying Discovery That He Was Born In America
BALTIMORE, MARYLAND— An American hospital fired one of its resident doctors Friday…
Netanyahu Promises To Pass Over Any Congressman With Israeli Flag On Their Door
WASHINGTON — Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu announced Friday that his political…
China Assures Americans Tiny Cameras In Panda Bear’s Eyes Are Not For Spying
BEIJING, CHINA — Minutes after China's President Xi Jinping announced during a…
Canada’s Official United Nations Address Delivered Entirely In Punjabi
NEW YORK, NEW YORK — International diplomats were left tapping their translation…
Zelensky Spotted Passing Collection Basket Around United Nations
NEW YORK, NEW YORK — Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky was spotted passing…
Trump Taunts Banned Reporters By Replacing Them With Sock Puppets
WASHINGTON — In a gloating, triumphant display of media mockery, President Donald…
Newsom Unveils Bold El Niño Preparedness Plan By Blaming Someone Else After It Happens
SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA — California Governor Gavin Newsom unveiled the state's comprehensive preparedness…
Fox News Fills Trump Blackout By Spending Six Hours Discussing Its Trump Blackout
NEW YORK, NEW YORK — Fox News was reportedly scrambling Monday to…
Gavin Newsom Denies Allegations He Has Been Using Taxpayer Money Responsibly
SACRAMENTO, CALIFORNIA — California Gov. Gavin Newsom issued a furious denial Saturday…
Mark Carney Spins Prize Wheel To Determine Which Country Canada Will Sell Out To Next
OTTAWA, ONTARIO — Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney unveiled a new foreign-policy…