Mayor Mamdani Executes Defiant Air Conditioner To Enforce Heatwave Edict
NEW YORK — Standing before a high-definition camera in front of City…
Keir Starmer Steps Down, Immediately Handing Power To Bold New Islamic Leader ‘Keirlifa Starmaleed’
LONDON, UK — Following months of historic unpopularity, compounding street protests, and…
UK Unveils New Culturally Sensitive Easter Bunny
LONDON, UK — In a move to promote inclusivity during the Easter…
Iran Council Chooses Achmed The Dead Terrorist As New Supreme Leader
TEHRAN, IRAN — Following the sudden death of Iran’s longtime Supreme Leader…
Mayor Mamdani Goes Door-To-Door Checking Under Floorboards For Hidden Dogs
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK — Mayor Zohran Mamdani announced a citywide…
Tim Walz Arrested For Throwing Tampons At ICE Agents During Somali Protest
MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA-- During a heated confrontation with federal law enforcement, Minnesota Governor…
Ilhan Omar Longs For The Simpler Times When She Only Had To Buy One Holiday Gift For Brother And Husband
MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA-- Congresswoman Ilhan Omar, known for her impassioned speeches on immigration…
UK Dog Sentenced To 12 Months In Kennel For Eating Bacon Treat Near Mosque
LONDON, UK-- In an unprecedented legal case facing global scrutiny, a 3-year-old…
Tall New York City Buildings On High Alert After Zohran Mamdani Boards Plane
NEW YORK-- Emergency protocols were quietly activated across Manhattan’s tallest skyscrapers this…
New Muslim Mayor Zohran Mamdani Invites Gay Supporters To Rooftop Celebration
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- To show his appreciation for helping him…
Absentminded Terrorist Keeps Leaving Sticky Notes To Remind Him To Blow Up Building
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- According to sources close to the international…
U.S. Sends Goat Ambassador To Afghanistan To Woo Taliban Into Returning Bagram Air Base
WASHINGTON-- In a bizarre attempt to reclaim Bagram Air Base from the…