German Leaders Praise Terrorist Suspect For Ramming Pride Attendees Rather Than Throwing Them Off Rooftops
BERLIN, GERMANY — In a stunning display of progressive optimism following Saturday’s…
Keir Starmer Steps Down As Prime Minister To Spend More Time With His Local Grooming Gang
LONDON, UK — Bringing an end to one of the least popular…
EU Solves Objectification Of Female Athletes By Mandating Progressive, Full-Body Burkas
BRUSSELS — Building upon recent European Broadcasting Union guidelines aimed at eliminating…
Mayor Mamdani Condemns Church Arsonists For Not Using Halal Matches
NEW YORK—Responding to yet another church fire this week, Mayor Mamdani held…
Mayor Mamdani Executes Defiant Air Conditioner To Enforce Heatwave Edict
NEW YORK — Standing before a high-definition camera in front of City…
Keir Starmer Steps Down, Immediately Handing Power To Bold New Islamic Leader ‘Keirlifa Starmaleed’
LONDON, UK — Following months of historic unpopularity, compounding street protests, and…
UK Unveils New Culturally Sensitive Easter Bunny
LONDON, UK — In a move to promote inclusivity during the Easter…
Iran Council Chooses Achmed The Dead Terrorist As New Supreme Leader
TEHRAN, IRAN — Following the sudden death of Iran’s longtime Supreme Leader…
Mayor Mamdani Goes Door-To-Door Checking Under Floorboards For Hidden Dogs
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK — Mayor Zohran Mamdani announced a citywide…
Tim Walz Arrested For Throwing Tampons At ICE Agents During Somali Protest
MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA-- During a heated confrontation with federal law enforcement, Minnesota Governor…
Ilhan Omar Longs For The Simpler Times When She Only Had To Buy One Holiday Gift For Brother And Husband
MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA-- Congresswoman Ilhan Omar, known for her impassioned speeches on immigration…
UK Dog Sentenced To 12 Months In Kennel For Eating Bacon Treat Near Mosque
LONDON, UK-- In an unprecedented legal case facing global scrutiny, a 3-year-old…