An Impatient Joe Biden Hires Freddy Krueger To Vaccinate Hesitant People While They’re Sleeping
WASHINGTON-- Joe Biden has finally reached his breaking point in trying to…
Biden Hires Hillary Clinton To Yell ‘What Difference Does It Make’ Whenever Asked About Afghanistan
WASHINGTON-- Resident Joe Biden has gone on the offensive against pesky news…
Newly Unearthed: Over 2,000 Year Old Confucius Quote Telling Future Americans To Take COVID Vaccine
BEIJING, CHINA-- A never-before-seen quote from famed Chinese philosopher Confucius has been…
Biden Builds Border Wall Around Florida To Keep Freedom-Loving Cubans Out Of The U.S.
WASHINGTON-- Joe Biden vowed to stop the sudden surge of freedom-seeking Cubans…
Joe Biden Says Farsighted White Hens Are America’s Number One Domestic Terrorists
WASHINGTON-- At a recent earthshattering news conference in a lookalike White House…
New CDC Guidelines Now Say Dead People Only Need To Wear Three Masks When Buried
ATLANTA, GEORGIA-- The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) announced new…
MLB Punishes Georgia For ‘Un-American Election Laws’ By Moving All-Star Game To More Patriotic China
ATLANTA, GEORGIA-- Major League Baseball has decided to relocate the 2021 All-Star…
Biden Blames Russian Hackers For His Fall On Air Force One Steps
WASHINGTON-- The pesky Russians are at it again, says top Democrats. After…
Miracle: Joe Biden Cures Kamala Harris Of Head Lice After Sniffing Her Hair
WASHINGTON-- In what is being considered nothing less than a miracle, Joe…
Racist Dr. Seuss Books Reinstated After It’s Revealed Author Was A Liberal Democrat
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- Cancel culture has officially apologized for censoring…
Biden Voters Justify Syria Bombing Saying At Least They Got Rid Of Trump’s Mean Tweets
WASHINGTON-- Immediately after Joe Biden ordered the entire country of Syria to…
Equality: Biden Orders All Zoo Lions That Identify As Antelopes To Be Allowed Into Antelope Enclosures
WASHINGTON-- Joe Biden has taken a big step towards protecting the rights…
