NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK– A recently unveiled giant bronze statue of an overweight black woman in Times Square was arrested late last night after it was caught carrying dozens of pairs of sneakers that it had looted from a local Nike shoe store.
Along with a few other bronze statues that were also unveiled on the same day, the large statue of a black woman was nabbed by police as it tried exiting the shoe store with the stolen merchandise. It was a short chase for the officers being that the statue was too fat and heavy to get very far.
“The statue was charged with breaking into the store, stealing, and resisting arrest,” said the arresting officer to local news reporters. “The statue is currently being held in a local jail awaiting trial where it will most certainly be released with no charges by a radical Democrat judge.”
The creator of the bronze statue said that his triumphant figure didn’t do anything wrong and was simply a victim of a racist police department, claiming it was actually on its way to the local church to feed homeless people.
Only hours after the arrest of the statue, the Reverend Al Sharpton and Rep. AOC held a protest in front of the police station and have called on the racist police department to immediately release the innocent statue, claiming it was only taking those shoes so that it could sell them to feed its family.
