Trump Disqualified From Nobel Peace Prize For ‘Excessive Peace Deals,’ Committee Says
OSLO, NORWAY-- The Norwegian Nobel Committee today announced their decision to disqualify…
Mark Carney Gets Dominated By Trump After Forgetting His Elbows Back In Canada
WASHINGTON-- In an embarrassing display of international weakness, Canadian Prime Minister Mark…
JB Pritzker Yells ‘Nothing To See Here, Move Along,’ As Antifa Burns Down Governor’s Mansion Behind Him
SPRINGFIELD, ILLINOIS-- Flanked by Antifa rioters in black bloc gear throwing Molotov…
Pope Leo Hangs ‘Sorry, Illegal Immigrants, America’s That Way’ Signs On Vatican Wall
VATICAN CITY-- In a decision condemned by some as papal hypocrisy, Pope…
Chicago Mayor Warns Trump’s Military Presence Could Disrupt Drive-By Shootings
CHICAGO, ILLINOIS-- In an impassioned press conference held this morning at City…
Nancy Pelosi Goes On ‘Botox Strike’ Until Illegal Aliens Receive Free Healthcare
WASHINGTON-- In response to the government shutdown, former Speaker of the House…
BREAKING: James Comey Clears Himself Of All Charges After Rigorous 30-Second Self-Investigation
WASHINGTON-- Only hours after a federal grand jury indicted him on multiple…
Secret Service Agents Suffer PTSD Flashback After Trump Gets Stuck On Sloped Escalator
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- Still suffering from PTSD from last year's…
Pregnant Liberals Start Snorting Coke After RFK Jr. Claims Cocaine Bad For Unborn Babies
U.S.-- In response to a recent health announcement by RFK Jr., thousands…
U.S. Sends Goat Ambassador To Afghanistan To Woo Taliban Into Returning Bagram Air Base
WASHINGTON-- In a bizarre attempt to reclaim Bagram Air Base from the…
Trump Moves Pam Bondi’s Desk To Fox News Studios So Maybe She’ll Actually Do Something
WASHINGTON-- In an attempt to boost the productivity of his top law…
Keir Starmer Assures Trump UK Has ‘Robust Free Speech’ As On-Screen Chyron Lists Recent Speech-Related Arrests
LONDON-- As the UK continues to fight accusations of banning free speech,…