CDC Declares Chuck Schumer’s Fourth Of July BBQ A Public Health Emergency
ATLANTA, GEORGIA— The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) elevated Senate…
Chuck Schumer Hisses And Recoils In Agony After Staffer Wishes Him ‘Merry Christmas’
WASHINGTON-- Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer reportedly emitted a low, animalistic hiss…
Democrats Warn Trump, DOGE It’s Unconstitutional To Stop Their USAID Money Laundering Schemes
WASHINGTON-- Angry Democrats took to the streets to protest President Donald Trump…
Chuck Schumer Says January 6 Was Worse Than The Day His Aunt Edna Burnt His Potato Latkes
WASHINGTON-- In an effort to drive home to the American people just…
Chuck Schumer Says His Mother’s Sister’s Neighbor’s Son’s Mailman’s Mechanic’s Dentist’s Patient Was Targeted On January 6
WASHINGTON-- New York Senator Chuck Schumer was the latest grieving Democrat politician…
Democrats Replace Themselves With Cardboard Cutouts To Boycott Hearing, Actually Get More Done
WASHINGTON-- Senate Democrats refused to show up at the Judiciary Committee hearing…
Democrats Use Ouija Board To Communicate With Ginsburg’s Spirit To Prove Her Dying Wish
WASHINGTON-- Persistent Democrats have finally proven that Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader…
Thousands Of Rioters Hired After Democrats Deem Them Essential Workers
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK-- Thousands of beneficial rioters have been hired…
Nancy Pelosi Apologizes To Trump After Eating Snickers Bar: ‘I Was Hungry And Wasn’t Myself’
WASHINGTON-- House Speaker Nancy Pelosi has apologized to President Donald Trump for…
Establishment Democrats Hold Their Breath After Trump Says Breathing Good For Health
WASHINGTON-- Corporate Democrats are urging everyone to start holding their breath after…
Frantic Democrats Accidentally Get Locked Out Of Their Own Closed-Door Impeachment Hearings
WASHINGTON-- An intense closed-door testimony this morning became even more disjointed after…
Be My Valentine: Nancy Pelosi’s Love Letter To Trump To Avert Another Shutdown
WASHINGTON-- In a last ditch effort to avoid another lengthy partial government shutdown,…