WASHINGTON– In a cringe-worthy moment of bipartisan embarrassment, both the Republican National Committee (RNC) and the Democratic National Committee (DNC) were caught yesterday offering lucrative X contracts to the same Indian troll farm for authentic grassroots support. The revelation came hours after Elon Musk rolled out X’s new “Country of Origin” feature, which lets users see where their followers are really from.
The RNC and DNC were reportedly bidding against each other for the Indian troll farm’s services, which included creating thousands of fake American accounts to boost politicians’ X engagement and sway elections.
“Oh boy, this was kind of awkward,” said an RNC spokesperson with a chuckle after the discovery. “It appears as though we have a lot more in common than we think with our colleagues across the aisle. Perhaps we can just pay those Indians a few cents more to do double duty. Still cheaper than hiring an American.”
Meanwhile, the DNC admitted they’d hired the same firm to create “progressive” accounts, paying them to make it seem like young college students actually loved and thought New York Democrat Chuck Schumer was such a cool guy with great policies.
X’s new feature has exposed a global fake news epidemic. Accounts once thought to be American citizens were revealed to be from India, Pakistan, Israel, Turkey, Russia, and even Africa.
“LOL, Turns out America’s culture war was a global group project this whole time,” Musk posted, reveling in the controversy.
The fallout has left politicians scrambling on what to do now that everyone knows their millions of followers were mostly bots and foreigners.
“I guess I’ll have to find some other way to convince Americans that it’s in their best interest to send billions of dollars to Israel and other foreign countries,” posted Sen. Ted Cruz on X.
Congress has announced an emergency hearing on “Foreign Troll Farms in American Politics,” not to stop it, but to figure out some way to be able to hide their duplicitous actions better from the American people.
