BEIJING, CHINA– An extremely unusual occurrence happened in China this week when a peculiar orange, round-shaped object lightly appeared in the middle of the normally smog-covered sky, causing thousands of Chinese citizens to stare in awe and take pictures of the weird celestial body.
For a whole five minutes, the bright orange sphere broke through the dark and dreary polluted sky as numerous people ran away in fright not knowing what was going on and believing that they were under attack by the Chinese government again for thinking negative thoughts about President Xi Jinping.
“I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw that scary orange circle in the sky,” said a local Chinese woman by way of Google Translate. “In my thirty-one years on earth I’ve never seen such a strange bright thing poking through our normally beautiful dark gray, smoky sky. It felt like my skin was burning. Maybe wearing nine face masks is still not enough to protect me.”
The government of China put out a statement saying that the orange sphere was an evil, anti-communist star called the sun and they promised to never let it be seen again by tripling their air pollution efforts to help increase the amount of smog that covers the sky.
After the sun broke through the hazy sky once again, President Xi ordered that the star be arrested and thrown into a gulag and also banned any images depicting the sun in print or online.
