Scientists Rediscover Rare White Canadian Species Thought To Be Extinct
BRAMPTON, ONTARIO — In a stunning breakthrough that has captivated the global scientific…
Scientists Successfully Teach Man In Parrot Costume To Say Swear Words
PALO ALTO, CALIFORNIA-- In what is being hailed as a groundbreaking leap…
With Government Shutdown, Furloughed Scientists Forced To Conduct Lab Experiments On Family Members
WASHINGTON-- As the government shutdown stretches into its fifth week, reports are…
Shocking New Study Reveals That Death Is Leading Cause Of Death
PLACENTIA, CALIFORNIA-- A shocking new study performed by some of the world's…
Total Recall: New Procedure Let’s You Pretend You’re Back In Better Time When Trump Was President
U.S.-- A highly sophisticated new technology has been recently developed that gives…
Elon Musk Now Controls Twitter CEO’s Brain With Neuralink
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA-- Immediately after purchasing a 9.2% stake in Twitter, Elon…
Researchers Disappointed Alleged Bigfoot Sighting In Illinois Was Only Ape-Like Creature Jeffrey Epstein
HARRISBURG, ILLINOIS-- Sasquatch sleuths were ecstatic after hearing that an Illinois man…
Mad Scientist Fauci Taunts His Victims By Wearing Dog Costume During Latest Interview
BETHESDA, MARYLAND-- As if millions of Americans weren't already disgusted by his…
Anthony Fauci Slams Fox News For Not Exterminating Lara Logan For Comparing Him To Nazi Doctor
WASHINGTON-- An incensed Dr. Anthony Fauci has responded to Lara Logan's claim…
Maskless Science Denier Still Waiting Patiently To Die Any Day Now
PORTLAND, OREGON-- For the last year and a half, a local maskless…
Experts Confirm: Using Stock Photos Of Fake Scientists In COVID Articles Makes Story Appear More Believable
CHICAGO, ILLINOIS-- A new study at the Health Fabrication Institute suggests if…
Scientists Invent Mental Workout For People Either Too Lazy Or Too Fat To Exercise
NEW BRUNSWICK, NEW JERSEY-- How would you like to get the perfect…