Tag: Dead

Media Submits Retraction After Discovering Corpse Found In Congress Was Just Mitch McConnell

WASHINGTON-- News media outlets have apologized after reporting that a dead body…

Daily Soak Staff

Biden Gives Jimmy Carter One Final Sniff Goodbye

WASHINGTON-- While attending the funeral of former President Jimmy Carter held at…

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New Polling Shows Kamala Harris Leads Trump Among Dead Voters

U.S.-- In a series of recent polls, Vice President Kamala Harris has…

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Satan Welcomes Home Favorite Son Jacob Rothschild

HELL-- Financier and one of the wealthiest people in the world Jacob…

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10 Weird But Totally Awesome Things That Only Happen In Japan

TOKYO, JAPAN-- Japan is the coolest place on earth and no other…

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Waiting For Your Girl To Finish Putting Makeup On Meme

πŸ˜ƒ MEME: Me waiting for my girlfriend to finish putting makeup on…

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Israel Makes War Friendlier By Putting Smiley Faces On Bombs Before Dropping Them

GAZA-- In an effort to make the horrors of war a little…

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Apathetic Man Doesn’t Support Israel Or Palestine

MANCHESTER, NEW HAMPSHIRE-- With the war between Israel and Palestine raging most…

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CNN Reports Israel-Palestine Attacks Are Fiery But Mostly Peaceful Protests

ATLANTA, GEORGIA-- America's most trusted news source CNN has reported that the…

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Death Row Inmate Pulls Fire Alarm To Delay Execution

MONTGOMERY, ALABAMA-- A death row inmate who was only minutes away from…

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Mitch McConnell Swallows Nervously After Watching Grim Reaper Grab Dianne Feinstein

WASHINGTON-- Senator Dianne Feinstein was taken by the Grim Reaper recently and…

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Obama Posts Help Wanted Ad For ‘Reliable Male Chef, Swimming Experience Not Required’

MARTHA'S VINEYARD-- Former President Barack Hussein Obama wasted no time searching for…

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