WASHINGTON — The White House announced Saturday that a long-awaited historic peace agreement between the United States and Iran has been postponed after staffers discovered that tomorrow’s schedule was already occupied by a separate historic peace agreement between the United States and Iran.
According to the White House, the scheduling conflict was discovered during a routine review of the president’s calendar, where aides noticed that Sunday had inadvertently been booked with three historic breakthroughs, two final agreements, one permanent ceasefire, and an emergency ceremony celebrating the successful completion of a future peace deal.
“The deal’s going great,” Trump told reporters. “Better than anybody has ever seen. We have so many peace deals with Iran that frankly we can’t keep track of them. Nobody has ever had this many peace deals. Obama couldn’t get one. We have twelve.”
The administration’s postponement has reportedly taken a toll on Vice President JD Vance, who was spotted returning a ceremonial peace-treaty blazer to its garment bag after learning the signing ceremony had once again been postponed for the 39th time since March.
At press time, administration officials had tentatively rescheduled the historic agreement for Tuesday, before discovering Tuesday was already occupied by the celebration commemorating the successful signing of the same agreement.
