LONDON, UK– Responding to President Donald Trump’s recent lawsuit alleging defamation and fabricated quotations in its January 6 coverage, the BBC released a statement clarifying that while some words attributed to Trump may not have been spoken by Trump, the reporting was nevertheless “fully consistent with our long-standing tradition of lying constantly.”
When confronted by news reporters, a BBC spokesperson not only admitted to fabricating news about Trump, but basically admitted to lying about everything.
“Look, we’re not just lying about Trump, we lie about everything,” BBC spokesperson Nigel Gobbernob said after chuckling. “From climate change to COVID-19, we’ve got a 24/7 propaganda machine. So us getting caught lying about Trump is not really that big of a deal.”
As the lawsuit moves forward, the BBC has vowed to keep lying harder, promising to double down on the fabrications by calling Trump a Russian spy, a Nazi, and even literally Hitler.
“If you believe everything we say on the telly, then that’s your problem,” said Gobbernob, shrugging his shoulders. “If we’re not able to lie then our entire ecosystem of narrative-driven truth-adjacent reporting would crumble.”
