LONDON, UK — Government sources say Prime Minister Keir Starmer is currently facing a difficult policy dilemma over whether British citizens should be arrested after posting opinions online or before they have the chance to post them at all.
PM Keir Starmer spent the early morning hours on Monday paralyzed with indecision over whether to maintain the current policy of arresting citizens for social media posts or to pivot to the more progressive model of arresting citizens pre-post.
“Arresting people for posts has definitely been proven effective,” Starmer thought to himself. “But arresting them before they post could prevent the unpleasantness of citizens expressing themselves entirely. Why does being a dictator have to be so difficult?”
Even though Starmer was proud of the success of recent efforts to investigate thousands of people for supposedly offensive social media posts, he wasn’t sure if detaining people before they even post would streamline the process of turning the UK into a total police state.
At press time, Starmer was said to be also torn between banning misinformation or just declaring reality misinformation.
