WASHINGTON– Local dog owners have been on high alert after it was reported that retired NIH director Dr. Fauci was caught donning a full-body beagle furry costume in an attempt to lure unsuspecting canines into his home basement for medical experiments.
Neighbors reported seeing Anthony Fauci, 84, prancing around his front yard in the elaborate dog outfit, complete with floppy ears and a wagging tail, before leading a pack of curious beagles into his basement laboratory.
According to eyewitnesses, Fauci would emit high-pitched “woofs” and offer treats to the dogs before dragging them into his underground lab, where he allegedly conducted twisted experiments reminiscent of his NIH days.
The diabolical scientist came under fire back in 2019 when inspectors found evidence of flies feasting on canine facial tissue, as well as devices designed to amplify the dogs’ pain responses.
When confronted by reporters outside his home, Dr. Fauci claimed the outfit was just a hobby and the basement was merely a doggy daycare facility that he had built in an effort to atone for all the dogs he tortured in the past, promising that all of the medical devices and sandflies in his basement were just play toys and nothing to worry about.
