VATICAN CITY– The funeral proceedings for deceased Pope Francis suddenly came to a halt after UK Prime Minister Keir Starmer made the Islamic call to prayer and then placed his rug down onto the ground in front of the casket to pray to Allah.
Thousands of people looked on in confusion while UK Prime Minister Keir Starmer began loudly singing the Adhan call to prayer right before pushing a group of mourners out of the way to start reciting the Muslim Arabic prayer.
“Allahu Akbar, Ashhadu an la ilaha illallah,” sang Starmer while washing his feet in a water fountain nearby. “Ashhadu an la ilaha illallah, um, yada yada yada, uh, oh my, I hope no one’s listening because I can’t remember the rest of the lines.”
After he had finished praying, Starmer then chastised the Pope’s funeral proceedings for the apparent lack of diversity and told a few of the Cardinals that he was quite offended that there weren’t enough transgendered, black Muslims at the funeral service.
Once he returned to the United Kingdom, Starmer took out his aggression on UK citizens by having a few innocent, little, old grandmothers arrested.
